For once, Brexit wasn’t the week’s biggest car crash
SO WHO was in charge of the Queen of car crashes this week? Prince Philip going from the Duke of Edinburgh to the Dukes of Hazzard? Or Brexit. Tough call.
We’ll start with a good news story. The brave woman who set off on a four-year, 20,000-mile trek around the coastline of the UK and Ireland.
The walk itself only takes six months. She’ll spend the other three-and-a-half years trying to get across the Irish border.
And if she’s lucky, she might avoid getting run over by Prince Philip doing a wheelie.
Or what about that other high-profile car crash? BT Sport presenter Jake Humphrey walked away from a road accident after hosting Blackburn’s FA Cup clash with Newcastle.
Thankfully, Jake was OK but slightly concussed. Meaning he won’t be able to host their next football coverage, though will be well placed to fill in for Michael Owen as a pundit.
Whatever happens, all roads still lead to the big Brexit crash on March 29. Theresa May has met members of different parties in Westminster to try to find a way of getting some cross-party agreement on a deal.
Theresa has been seen with the Lib Dem party, the Scottish National Party and some time soon she’ll be seen at her leaving party.
May also told MPs she’ll return to the Commons with an alternative Brexit plan next week after her humiliating defeat on Tuesday night.
It’s going to cost her dear. I mean, the fag packet she’ll be writing it on the back of will set her back the best part of a tenner.
Bob Geldof has slammed the British Government as “incapable and inept” and said that Brexit will be a disaster.
On the plus side, we’ll be so screwed after Brexit that the people of Ethiopia are planning to put on a concert for us this time.
Mind you, if there is a food shortage Donald Trump might be the man to sort it. The US president put on a fast-food feast at the White House, blaming the lack of catering staff on the government shutdown.
The deliveries were all over the place. The Italian and Chinese came pretty quickly. But the Mexican spent ages outside trying to get in, before someone eventually chucked it over a wall.
Which brings us back to Prince Philip and the EU. Twitter summed it up well. Brexit is like a 97-year-old royal behind the wheel.
You know it’s a bad idea but are too polite to stop it.
Gillette’s new advert targeting toxic masculinity has been accused of unfairly tarring all guys with the same brush.
Personally, I think the advert is to be applauded.
Partly because of its message but mainly because it winds up Piers Morgan. Piers predictably had an epic rant over the ad, claiming he’d now prefer to be shaved with a bare razor.
Ideally by a blind pensioner with a touch of the shakes. Or Prince Philip after a wee drive.