HE IS SCARRED BY DIVORCE & WON’T COMMIT

Dear Coleen

SADLY, my boyfriend and I decided to go our separate ways a couple of weeks ago and I’m heartbroken.

We’d been seeing each other for nine months and things were good.

But he was recently divorced when we got together and I think he’s terrified of getting into another serious relationship.

The end of his marriage was acrimonious – his ex was having an affair – so I can understand him being wary but I also think he’s losing something great with me.

I know he still loves me too, but he’s scared.

Have you any ideas of what I can do to salvage this relationship?

Coleen says

WELL, maybe he’s just not ready and needs more time to be on his own and come to terms with the end of his marriage.

I wonder if you could suggest seeing each other but taking it really slowly to see how things develop.

What you don’t want it to be is a rebound relationship and a bridge to help him move on because it sounds as if you really love him and see a future with him.

If he’s suffered a bitter divorce I can totally understand him being wary of any talk of settling down.

However, if you’re prepared to give him the space he needs, then he might be open to giving the relationship another shot.

All you can do is suggest it and leave him to think it over.

He might find he really misses you and wants to find a way back that will suit you both.

Just don’t put your own life on hold indefinitely while he works things through.