GIRL WANTS A DOG BUT I HAVE A PHOBIA

Dear Coleen

MY eight-year-old daughter is desperate to have a dog and, I have to admit, that over lockdown it would have been good for her to have a pet, as she’s an only child. My husband is all for it, too.

However, I’m scared of dogs and have been since being attacked by a neighbour’s vicious dog when I was a child.

Now, if I even see a dog in the distance, I’ll cross the road to avoid it. It’s a real problem because we live out in the countryside and there are dogs everywhere.

Can you say anything that will give me some confidence?

I feel embarrassed that this is such a problem for me but, at the same time, I’d like to get over it.

Coleen says

LOOK, it’s a phobia like any other, so you shouldn’t feel silly or embarrassed – you have a good reason to feel how you do. I think especially when we’ve suffered a trauma like this as a child, it stays with us and can be very hard to overcome.

I currently have four pooches, whom I adore. Dogs bring a lot of love into your family and also give kids a sense of responsibility, as well as a fun companion.

Having one might also help you get over your fear.

I wonder if you’ve tried any kind of therapy to help with the phobia – exposure therapy, for example, where you can gradually get to know a dog and feel comfortable around it. Or hypnotherapy, which can be effective too.

If you haven’t been around dogs since you were attacked, you don’t have any positive experiences to contradict the horrible one you had as a child. So it’s about familiarising yourself with dogs and gaining confidence around them.

Also, if you do decide to take the plunge, go for something small and manageable. I have a Yorkshire terrier and a shih-tzu, who are both easy to look after.