PUSHY MUM’S PUTTING ME OFF A-LEVELS

Dear Coleen

I’M in my final year of secondary school and due to sit exams next summer. I’ve always been quite academic and a good student, but my mum puts too much pressure on me to achieve.

Even when I was younger, she drilled me when it came to schoolwork and homework, and I’ve basically had enough.

To be honest, I am so stressed I feel like giving up and not sitting my exams at all.

She’s always talking about universities and the best courses and has too much involvement. It’s like she’s going to be taking the course instead of me.

I think she means well, but I’m starting to resent her and I snap at her all the time.

How can I get her to back off?

Coleen says

IT sounds as if you’re rebelling against your mum’s involvement because you felt under a lot of pressure growing up.

But try not to snap at her – tell her how you’re feeling and that, if anything, she’s putting you off wanting to study hard and even to go to university. She might not realise how you feel or that she’s overwhelming and overbearing at times.

I have to admit, even at my age, if someone constantly nags me to do something, I don’t feel like doing it at all.

And I think that’s just human nature – it’s about feeling in control of your own life and making your own choices. It’s natural to rebel and question things at your age, but the key thing is balance – balancing studying with a social life and valuable downtime.

So why not talk to her about how you can achieve more balance. Ultimately, taking time out and recharging your batteries will help you to be a better student – and you’ll be a lot happier, too.