MATES THINK I’M SMUG FOR BEING HAPPY

Dear Coleen

I’M A woman in her early 40s and have a fantastic relationship with my husband – my issue is my friends.

Whenever we get together, they’re always complaining about their husbands and partners and I never join in because I have nothing to complain about.

The other day, I was out with a few of these pals and I mentioned that I never argue with my husband and that I feel left out because I have nothing bad to say about him.

One of the women said, “Wow, smug!” and the rest laughed, so I came back with, “I don’t know why any of you are with your partners because all you do is moan about them”.

It went down like a cup of cold sick and when we’ve met up since there are knowing glances between them, as if they’re in on a private joke at my expense.

Why should I apologise for having a good marriage?

Coleen says

YOU don’t have to apologise for having a good marriage or explain it to them but if they want to sit there and moan, let them.

It sounds like it’s a bit of banter and an outlet for the stuff they deal with at home. If anything, it should just make you appreciate your own marriage more.

If you get a snide look or a catty comment, then come back with some banter or sarcasm – stop comparing and criticising each other.

Also, you may not have any issues with your marriage now but, at some point in the future, you might appreciate the opportunity to let off some steam yourself.

I’D LIKE to respond to the letter from the lady struggling to keep her cool with her boyfriend’s nasty ex (Dear Coleen, Sept 20). The positive side of this is, you can be reasonably sure he won’t get back together with her. If I were you, I’d just ignore her behaviour. Joan Carter via email