HE’S SPOILING OUR UNGRATEFUL KIDS

Dear Coleen

MY husband came from a pretty poor background and his mum brought him up alone after his dad walked out on them when he was a baby.

We now have two children of our own, aged five and seven, and my husband dotes on the pair of them. He’s a great dad, but he does spoil them with material things and it’s starting to show in my son’s behaviour. He just expects to be given everything he wants and if he doesn’t get it, he’ll throw an almighty tantrum and be extremely rude.

My husband has done well for himself through hard work and just wants to give his kids what he didn’t have, but it’s ruining them.

He’s already gone overboard with Christmas presents and we’ve argued over it. Any advice?

Coleen says

WELL, it’s obvious your husband wants to give his kids what he never had when he was growing up and I get that.

It’s coming from a place of love, but of course it’s not necessarily helping your children to grow up appreciating what they have or to have realistic expectations.

When it comes to Christmas, it might be a good idea to help him see that your kids are happy and cared for every day of the year, so there’s no need to be extravagant then.

At the age your kids are, they can either become overwhelmed if there are too many presents or they just don’t appreciate them.

I think experiences with your kids are more valuable than any gift, so perhaps plan some nice things over the holidays to do together as a family – not everything has to cost the earth.

This is the stuff they will remember, not some plastic toy.

You could also encourage your children to give back this Christmas and raise or donate some money for children who are less fortunate than them.