HOW CAN I GET OUT OF NEGATIVE MOOD?

Dear Coleen

I’M a woman in my 40s and for the past couple of years I’ve felt very negative about everything. I always expect the worst and struggle to find joy in much – everything seems stressful.

My relationship hit the rocks during the lockdowns, which was a shock, as my partner and I had always had a good relationship, and I struggle every day with juggling childcare and work.

Things are back on an even keel with my partner, but he still says I’m miserable most of the time and therefore he’s unhappy, too. I just don’t know how to get out of the rut. I’d love some ideas.

Coleen says

I THINK most of us have struggled to some degree over the past couple of years, and I think it’s a shock if you’ve never been prone to depression or anxiety before to suddenly be hit with it.

I struggled with anxiety during Covid, a new feeling, and I had to find ways of coping with it.

Seeing your GP is a good first step – explain you’re feeling low and that it’s gone on for some time and see what they suggest. I think admitting how you feel to someone else and taking control will make you feel like you’re doing something positive.

It probably took you a while to get into this rut, so it’ll take some time to get out – don’t put too much pressure on yourself. Organisations such as mind.org. uk have lots of good advice.

It’s important to reach out and see what help is available – different types of therapy, for example – but it also helps to confide in the people in your life. Maybe if you explained more to your partner, he’d understand better and be more supportive.

Take baby steps – do something small that makes you feel good every day. That might be speaking to a friend who makes you laugh, taking a walk, tuning into a podcast, listening to a meditation app and just giving yourself some TLC.