MARTINE OPENS HER HEART IN NEW SONGS
MARTINE McCutcheon says people will think she’s “a nutter” when they hear her comeback album.
The Loose Women star has opened up about her battles with depression, ME, Lyme disease and multiple miscarriages on her first release in 17 years.
And the former EastEnders star is worried people will think she’s crazy when they hear her heartfelt lyrics.
Martine, 40, said: “I never felt I would be well enough to return to music after all my health problems.
“It killed me not being able to do what I loved so I just started writing music for my own happiness and wellbeing.
“I never thought anyone would ever hear it. It was initially just for me and that’s why it is so raw and brutally honest. Now everyone’s going to hear what a nutter I am.”
She added: “Writing is really cathartic. It’s basically therapy and helps to save you from yourself and your own destructive thoughts.”
Martine became a household name after joining EastEnders in 1995 to play Tiffany Mitchell. The popular character’s death on New Year’s Eve in 1998 was watched by 22million people, turning her into one of the most famous stars in the country.
She went on to launch a pop career, scoring six top 10 singles, and starred in the box office hit Love Actually.
But her career and personal life has been troubled ever since due to a Showbiz Editor JAMES INGHAM series of illnesses, miscarriages and bankruptcy. She now has a two-yearold son Rafferty with music producer husband Jack McManus. Referring to her album title Lost and Found, Martine said: “In my life I have had it all, lost it all and I think you have to be a survivor. “One lyric is, ‘Lost my hope and all my dignity.’ And that’s how I felt. It’s hard to keep your dignity when you make mistakes and have no privacy.” Martine said of her love-hate relationship with fame: “I hate the pressure – being judged, being scrutinised. “I have always found that side of things so stressful. Having no privacy is tough physically and mentally. It’s not a normal job. “I haven’t got the hate as much this time and I think that’s because I’m a happier person. “I have a lovely family, which I adore. It’s no longer a lonely existence. “First time around I felt ostracised and lonely. I was known for being the ‘real’ girl that everyone could identify with and relate to. But I didn’t feel like I could relate to anyone.” However, she is open-minded about joining Corrie or Emmerdale. She said: “I’d never rule out a soap. I love that work. I don’t watch EastEnders any more but I absolutely loved it.” Martine’s new album Lost and Found is out on August 11. Tickets for her November tour are now on sale.