More soapbox than jukebox
How strong must Vanessa’s bladder be in Emmerdale, below?
Will Tarby be taking Lynchy’s ashes on tour? Even now Kenny has more life in him than Des O’Connor has.
Is it just me or does anyone else watch Sunday morning cooking shows and head out for a pub roast?
ROD, Ronnie & Kenney at the BRITs. Mandy Patinkin, Homeland. New Simpsons episodes. Intelligence. Narcos: Mexico (Netflix). The Good Omens finale and Miranda Richardson.
THEY had an Indian takeaway on Endeavour, but Morse preferred the spicy Italian that turned up at his front door – Violetta.
HER husband Ludo should have his name intimately tattooed. Every time she sauntered into the bedroom it would spell Llandudno.
THANK heavens for Capaldi at the BRITs.
He might look like he shares a stylist with Boris Johnson, but the 23-year-old Glaswegian was a breath of fresh air.
Especially when he explained that his award-winning Someone You Love wasn’t about his ex, Love Island’s Paige Turley, but his late grandmother.
“I hope to God ITV don’t contact her to take part in a reality TV dating show,” he quipped.
Not once did Lewis feel the need to bombard us with trite political rants.
The BRITs are like EastEnders with music these days – drink, drugs, gun culture, dodgy propaganda...so it’s apt that Jack Whitehall went down like the soap’s Thames riverboat.
I haven’t seen such a deer in the headlights expression since Bambi’s mum died.
Jack, lumbered with a limp script, looked ill at ease and often seemed trapped in Lizzo’s gravitational field.
He only warmed up when he worked the tables and teased Harry Styles. Yet for every funny moment there were
Lewis
Email me at: garry.bushell@ dailystar.co.uk or write c/o Daily Star Sunday, One Canada Square, London E14 5AP awful half-hours. I don’t mind grime acts having axes to grind. I mind that they alienate millions.
Marley, Marvin and Sam Cooke made social commentary accessible, memorable and enduring.
No disrespect to south London rapper Dave, but will they be reciting Black on The X Factor in 2070 when Simon Cowell is a Botoxed brain in a jar?
Rod Stewart and Ronnie Wood still sounded sweet belting out 1971’s Stay With Me, even if Rod did forget the third verse.
The BRITs should have a heritage category that’s based on ticket sales. Everyone from Squeeze to Jethro Tull via George Benson is still out there.
It’s been years since Maiden won. Meanwhile, the audience for ITV’s pop awards plummeted to an all-time low.
Puzzling. Why would this politically one-sided, puffed-up bore-in, riddled with whining acts and maudlin music, be losing viewers?
SATURDAY Night Takeaway...Harriet Walker, The End, right... Georgina Campbell.
JON Snow, left, making a very hard slog of Very Hard Questions... The Split – BBC drama’s gift to rhyming slang.
THE end of Pale Horse – Sarah Phelps was flogging a dead one. Endeavour becoming a period soap. Heavy-handed background music on The Split. Naff reality shows feeding low self-esteem.
A TOP don wrote raunchy fiction about Cambridge students. This is crying out for a TV adaptation: The Slutty Professor.