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MY husband walked out of here two years ago in pursuit of a female colleague.
At first they lived together but then she asked him to leave.
For the past six months he’s been living in a cheap motel and now, inevitably, he’s asked if he can come home.
This is despite the fact that he’s not completely broken up with this other woman and they still see each other every day at work.
Our daughters are 16 and 17 and hate him. They can’t understand why he’s abandoned them and humiliated me.
His mother seems to think he’s having a mid-life crisis and I should have him back, but I have to ask, why should I?
I LOVE my boyfriend so much, but he uses me for sex and treats me like dirt.
When things go well for him, there’s no one to touch him – he’s funny, generous and makes me scream.
But when he’s not earning much, when his mates are winding him up and his family are on his back, he’s a living nightmare.
He becomes tricky, demanding and unreasonable. He asks me to do things that I’m really not comfortable with – both in bed and out of it.
At the moment I’m not really talking to him because he recently smashed up my room (I live in a flat share), deliberately keyed my car and pushed me over.
My crime? Refusing to withdraw the last of my savings and give them to him.
The fact is that I only have £300 left in my building society account (from a previous total of £5,000) and like to keep something aside for a rainy day.
But, apparently, this is selfish and mean of me. After his childish outburst, he went straight out and slept with a stranger from a hook-up app.
He even sent me the pictures to prove it.
When I still wouldn’t cough up my cash, he suggested I “pull my weight” by having sex with a mate of his for cash.
Again I declined his outrageous suggestion and we’ve been estranged ever since.
I realise he’s under pressure from his hard-nosed family who expect him to earn a fortune and make them proud, but that’s no excuse for acting like a monster.
Often he only turns up when he’s horny and drunk. He expects me to let him in at all hours of the day and night.
The problem is that we’ve been together on-and-off for such a long time that he’s my world.
Despite everything he does to me, he’s all I know, but I do have to admit I’m feeling increasingly unhappy.
JANE SAYS: Don’t allow your mother-in-law to put any kind of pressure on you because you don’t owe your estranged husband a bean.
He was the one who chose to leave his wife and family in pursuit of another woman.
Just because things haven’t gone his way doesn’t mean he can sneak back in again.
There now needs to be a number of very serious conversations about what he wants and what he’s thinking.
Is he prepared to change his job and completely drop this other woman from his life? Is he sorry for all of the hurt he’s caused you?
There’s a long road ahead he needs to travel. That’s not you being difficult, that’s you protecting yourselves from any future trauma. JANE SAYS: This creep pushed you over, did he? He physically attacked you and shoved you out of the way? That is abuse and you have to start seeing this moron for the monster he is.
He is a cold-hearted user, a con merchant and apparently totally unscrupulous.
This man doesn’t love you or care for you. All he’s interested in is ducking and diving and making life as pleasurable for himself as possible.
He’d ask you to do absolutely anything if it meant him earning a few quid in the process.
I’m sure that he is perfectly capable of charming the birds from the trees, but he’s never going to fulfil his promises to you, change or make you happy.
Sadly, he is not the man you need him to be. Maybe he is under pressure to earn money, but so is everyone.
What you must do now is speak to friends and family members who you trust and explain what you’ve experienced.
When you’re ready, report the physical and emotional abuse and the criminal damage to the police.
Forget loyalty because that all went out of the window long ago.
This is now about keeping you safe and starting afresh.