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THE hideous world of online dating is doing my head in.
I assumed that when my marriage broke up that I’d have no problem finding a man to replace my cheating, no-good ex.
But after more than 100 dates and a few nasty experiences I’m feeling more demoralised by the week. I’ve been out with bores, gold-diggers and liars.
I’ve been asked for sex after one drink and told that I’d look much better after extensive plastic surgery.
What gets me is that the photographs look nothing like the men who turn up.
Recently, I arranged to meet a chap at a local restaurant. He told me he was 45, solvent and single.
Lucky
He was actually 75, bankrupt and married. He admitted his photo was 30 years old, but said the married bit didn’t matter because his wife had dementia and would probably be dead soon.
Another chancer asked me for my full address and then Googled the value of my house.
When he saw it is worth quite a bit, he suggested moving in with me. He suggested I was lucky that a man like him was even interested in a woman like me.
I never realised the internet was teaming with so many circling sharks. I must admit I’ve had sex with a few men, but none of them cared about my pleasure or my orgasm – it was all about them.
One divorcee lit a cigarette after we had sex and said his last girlfriend had been 18. My cat is 18. How can I possibly compare when I’m just a simple woman looking for companionship and love?
I know I look good. I know my figure is great and my brain is sharp. But how do I meet someone special when no-one else is on my wavelength?
JANE SAYS: It sounds to me as if you’ve reached saturation point.
You’ve been let down, disappointed and insulted too many times.
Why don’t you take yourself out of the dating arena to calm down, re-set and remember who you are again? Set yourself some challenges and targets that have nothing to do with romance or dating.
What about learning a new skill, climbing a mountain or doing volunteer work?
Work out what excites you and rings your bells and go for it.
Who knows, you may even meet some interesting men and women along the way – not necessarily for love, but for friendship and a laugh.
There’s no getting away from the fact that you’ve had some very bad dating experiences, but it’s vitally important that you maintain your standards and believe in who you are.
Remember that you don’t owe anyone, anything.
I wonder if you actually gave yourself sufficient time to grieve and get over your painful divorce.
If your ex-husband failed to make you happy, then do you need to find personal happiness again in order to move on?
It’s often said that we find love in the most unlikely places.
So, when you’re ready, keep an open mind and remember that the world is yours for the taking.