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ONCE upon a time you could joke about being passed the razor blade when something left you in utter, foreheadslapping despair.
Obviously you can’t do that any more. I actually think joking has recently become a hate-crime so I’d best shut up.
But I am confused because the latest thing to make me want to vomit/scream/ kill myself is actually an advert for a razor. In particular the hideous, navelgazing, politically correct utter codswallop that is the new Gillette advert.
An astonishing piece of snowflake virtue-signalling that does all blokes down as bullies, sexists, child abusers, violent thugs and, basically, knuckle-dragging idiots.
If you haven’t seen it yet is shows a smug boss talking over a woman in a boardroom, little boys fighting while grown men ignore them and proudly declare: “Boys will be boys” and finally men wolf-whistling at women without being scolded by their peers.
It then goes on to reverse all of the above with the blokes being so “woke” that you actually do want to put them to sleep. Permanently.
“You’ll hurt one another,” says the “new man” dad separating the kids fighting. “That’s so not cool,” says one concerned chap to his mate who’d dared look at an attractive woman walking past.
Honestly thought it was some sort of satire on how mad the whole men and women thing has become. (And all the other genders obvs, #inclusive.)
But no. Gillette and the advertising agency behind this superb lesson in shooting yourself in the foot (Creative Resolutions Advertising Perfection – or CRAP for short) were deadly serious. They honestly thought that slagging off their target audience would sell more products.
Thankfully, men aren’t the total numpties Gillette thinks they are, with blokes vowing to boycott the razors.
Yay, thank God some men still have the balls they were born with.
Gillette is still using its famous tag-line “The best a man can get”. Though the best a man can actually get now appears to be an utter wimp in thrall to always doing the right thing so us wimmin aren’t offended.
Look no-one wants blokes to be the neanderthal sex pest aggressors portrayed in this ad but nor do most ordinary women want them to be tiptoeing around us in #MeToo T-shirts.
I like the fact that blokes are blokes. Hell, I even married one (okay so he might have been drugged at the time but…)
Men aren’t perfect but nor are women. Men and women will always sneak a peek at an attractive member of the opposite sex. And boardroom-bully bosses will always talk over other people no matter what sex they are.
The really annoying thing about this pile of cack, though, is that it not only patronises men but also portrays women as helpless creatures who can’t stand up for themselves. Um, hello boys, we can and do give as good as we get. We don’t need a huge company trying to flog stuff on the back of our fight for equality, thank you.
And seriously, Gillette, if you really wanted to make a stand on a sexual politics issue there’s a much less complicated way of doing it.
You could simply stop selling the nauseating pink range of razors and hair removal products you aim at women.
Products that are in most cases exactly the same as the men’s range but also cost more?