‘SHUT IT CRUSTIES. WE KNOW’

Dawn NEESOM

ON Sunday night a 16-year-old lad was stabbed multiple times in south London.

Only the prompt response of the Metropolitan Police and London Ambulance Service saved him from bleeding to death in the gutter.

At the same time a bunch of selfish, deluded, law-breaking bozos were preparing to set up a “climate camp” (complete with plastic tents and diesel generators) to bring our capital city to a standstill for two weeks.

Yep it’s Extinction Rebellion. An organisation which, incredibly, boasts it wants to bring police resources to breaking point. They are advising any arrested “campaigners” to refuse bail and reply “no comment” to questions – thereby clogging all police cells and courts while preventing any proper police work being carried out.

Which brings us back to the poor youth currently fighting for his life after that knife attack. Just 24 hours later the officers who, potentially, saved his life would have been wasting their time ungluing some badly-dressed, yoga-obsessed numpty from a government building. There are no words for that level of self-obsessed, self-righteous stupidity.

But you don’t even have to be that dramatic. A friend’s severely disabled, wheelchair-bound daughter struggled to get to the hospital appointment she’d waited three years for. Likewise an elderly neighbour was so worried about travelling across London for their cancer check-up he simply decided not to go. And that’s before you take into account the suffering of small businesses and workers – in particular the poorer employees who rely on cheap buses to travel to their low-paid, often zero-hour contract jobs.

We ARE aware. Most of us ARE doing our bit. And our government is doing more than almost any other country in the entire world. Most of what Extinction Rebellion is demanding isn’t even logistically possible. It wants to reduce greenhouse gas emissions to net zero by 2025. Laudable but impossible. The UK government pledged 2050 (the first major world economy to do so). While China, India and most of South America are too busy crying with laughter into their (non-recyclable) paper hankies.

Then there’s the fact they want us all to go vegan and even suggest that meat eating be made illegal. Makes me want to go buy a burger and I haven’t eaten meat for 33 years.

Some of the loony tunes actually held a candlelit vigil for the “murdered” carcasses of cows at London’s Smithfield meat market. An act only slightly undermined by the pictures of other eco-wazzocks queueing in a nearby McDonald’s.

Extinction Rebellion is the heady combination of hypocrisy and arrogance usually only seen in politics. Just with more pilates than pole dancing.

Particular favourite, though, was the hysterical dad who was so traumatised by his babies being burnt to death in a climate apocalypse (this weekend by the sound of him) he burst into uncontrolled tears live on TV.

This while lying in the middle of the road with his head underneath a car.

Actually maybe this extinction malarkey isn’t all bad. Provided we can pick which types we want to become extinct. Know where I’m starting…

★ FORGET the fake, sucked, tucked and plucked reality stars and TV celebrities. If you want the young females in your life to have proper role models point them in the direction of the inspirational Dina Asher-Smith and Katarina Johnson-Thompson. ★ Ordinary kids who became the golden girls of British athletics in Doha at the weekend. The only snowflake thing about them is the blizzards they ran through training to achieve their dreams. This is what being a young woman should be about.

BLOKES who binge booze are evidently a huge turn-on for women. It’s something to do with evolution and sinking alcohol delivering a “sexual signal”. Of course it does. The main “signal” being that he’s going to fall asleep in front of the telly, snore loudly and look remarkably like the poor whale that swam up the Thames.

THE only Brexit story to make you chuckle is the one saying lorry drivers stuck in traffic jams trying to cross the Channel will lead to an increase in dogging. I’ll call it Project Leer.

PROTESTS: Extinction Rebellion