DON’T MISS Just Jane
The nation’s top agony aunt
I HATE my life and everyone around me.
No-one realises just how much resentment and loathing I have fizzing inside.
Nothing ever goes my way. I’ve not had any luck or decent chances. I consider myself a clever bloke. I could have been a winner, but I’ve never had the breaks.
I’m past 35 and fully aware that I’ve not achieved my potential. I look at successful mates and relatives and fume with anger.
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Me? I’m lucky if I have £5 in my wallet at the end of the month.
I realise I take my frustrations out on those around me, but who can blame me when life is so unfair? My parents are currently snubbing me after a big row about money (what else?).
Basically, I borrowed £20,000 to start a car-washing business and it failed.
Then I had another £10,000 for shares (because I fancied trading) and £10,000 for an interest in a street food van.
Now they’ve been forced to downsize and say it’s all my fault.
My girlfriend says I need to pay them back, but how can I when I barely earn enough to live on?
Besides, she’s no help. Despite being together for five years she refuses to get a joint bank account with me.
She won’t allow me to live in her flat and walks away whenever we row.
She used to sympathise with me, but now tells me that I’ve had my last warning – which doesn’t really help.
JANE SAYS: Your girlfriend is at the end of her tether and your parents are completely exasperated by you.
You’ve clearly experienced bad luck and disappointment, but it’s no excuse for treating loved ones badly.
Sadly, the world doesn’t owe you a living and you’re in danger of losing your girl unless you start treating her decently and getting your act together.
Equally, your parents have to hear you’re sorry and will eventually pay them back.
Many of us suffer from feelings of jealousy and resentment – it’s human nature – but you have to keep fighting and keep trying.
Build bridges with those who’ve tried to help, look at patterns of behaviour and learn from your mistakes.
Would you also consider talking to a health professional about how you feel? Explain to your GP the traumas and stresses you go through on a daily basis.
Say that you hate feeling this way because always being negative and jealous is exhausting and prohibitive.
Ask to be referred to a mental health expert who will hopefully help you to see the good in life and people, while helping you to confront your demons and calm down.
Remember the mental health charity MIND (www. mind.org.uk) has a wonderful website.