My mum is cruel, loose and selfish SHE HAD FIGHT AT WEDDING
MY mother divorced the third time last May.
Now she’s dating a sugar daddy of 72 and a younger lad of 27.
She’s in her mid-forties and jokes that she likes to keep things “interesting”.
In other words she likes lots of sex and cash, and will date anyone who satisfies her huge appetite for the finer things.
She and I couldn’t be more different. She has to be the centre of attention.
Recently my brother got married and she insisted on wearing a pure white dress.
Hysterical
for
I warned her that the bride would be furious but my mother thought it amusing to be deliberately provocative.
The disco ended with my mum calling my new sister-in-law a “scheming gold digger” and my brother threatening to call the police.
I had to drag her out by the arm and she actually thought the whole thing was hysterical.
Sometimes she looks at me with thinly veiled disgust and spits that she can’t believe that someone as boring and dull as me came out of her body.
I’m 23 and desperate to leave home but can’t afford it.
If her young lover isn’t over here making her scream, then her creepy meal ticket is hanging around the house bragging about his wealth. I can’t believe the selfish way she lives her life.
Recently her younger lover went to Spain for a funeral and she immediately brought back a bloke she met in a bar. They had noisy sex for two whole days.
It was revolting. Then, she pinged over X-rated pictures to her lover “for a joke”.
The bloke was absolutely devastated. She couldn’t care less and laughed as he cried.
I don’t know what I ever did to deserve this vain, cold monster. What am I going to do?
JANE SAYS: You cannot allow your mother’s behaviour to get in the way of your dreams. I realise living with her must be challenging, but you don’t have to live in her shadow for ever.
Things may seem bleak right now, but there will come a time when you’re able to move on. Don’t allow yourself to become trapped.
If she relies on you for shopping, cooking or housekeeping, then make it clear to her that you’re not her slave.
Work out what it is you want from life. What are you good at and where do you see yourself in five, 10 or 20 years’ time. Can your brother or other family members help you to get out and move on?
Do you need to get extra qualifications or learn new skills? Be proactive and make things happen.
There’s no escaping the fact your mother is a gogetter. You may not like what she does but no one could accuse her of holding back or missing an opportunity.
No experience is wasted so learn from the way she operates – the good bits and the bad ones and vow to be your own (better) person.
I WORKED like stink to give my son a great education and upbringing. I went without new clothes and treats so he had every advantage.
Now he’s successful and living with a lovely girl. But I’ve just heard she’s giving up work as she wants to learn how to paint – and he’s fully supporting her. He’s going to be paying all the bills.
How does that work? I’m 57 and still putting in nine-hour days five days a week simply in order to keep my head above water. I’m bitter that she’s reaping the rewards of my sacrifices.
JANE SAYS: You can’t think like that.
Remember that your son had a fantastic childhood because you chose to live life in a certain kind of way.
You can hardly complain now that he’s successful.
He’s free to spend his money any way he sees fit. By all means ask him to help you, but don’t make an enemy of him. The fact is that none of us can ever expect gratitude and being bitter solves nothing. What work/ life changes can you make? Do you need to downsize and/or look at your life as a whole?