Cheating wife full of hate and booze
MY DAILY DESCENT TO HELL
MY wife say she’s cheated on me countless times.
She’s told me she’s slept with everyone from my old boss to my sworn enemy – with my best mate and late dad in between.
She can be a very cruel and heartless woman. She’s drinking too much at the moment. Nights in with her are a living torture.
The first bottle of wine is opened at 4pm. At first she’s funny and playful. I’m encouraged to get in the hot tub and we mess around. We have sex at around 6pm and it’s lovely.
But any time after 9pm is horrible. She has more wine with dinner and then it’s vodka. Her mood darkens and she becomes more belligerent and bitter.
Crying
She tells me I’m an excuse of a man and that I’m useless in bed. She says she could have done so much better for herself and that she only settled for me because all of her friends were getting married – and she simply didn’t want to be left on the shelf.
The self-pity and crying starts around midnight. She says she’s wasted her life and has so many regrets. She should have worked harder, travelled the world and risen to the top.
Apparently, my salary is risible and my “pathetic” holidays to my sister’s caravan are depressing.
I usually manage to get her up to bed by 1am where she tries to have sex with me again.
I push her away and I’m told she’s never loved me. She’s displaying very challenging, provocative behaviour that I don’t feel strong enough to deal with.
She seems to get a perverse pleasure out of hurting me.
Then she bounces out of bed at 10am like it was all a big joke.
JANE SAYS: Your mental health is taking a pounding and you don’t deserve this daily dose of misery. Your wife might argue that she’s frightened or bored. She might reason that alcohol takes the edge off her day, but it’s clear she has a serious problem.
Drinking heavily for many hours and then abusing you is not on. Does she admit she is an alcoholic? Will she accept she needs help?
Sit her down the next time she’s sober and make it clear that you can’t go on like this.
Her nocturnal behaviour isn’t funny or cute – it’s absolutely terrifying.
She subjects you to an unnecessary and unfair amount of worry and personal abuse. Is she willing to own up and change or do you need to think about a future without her? It’s that serious.
Insist she speaks to her GP as soon as she can.
If she doesn’t, then you’ll have to think about getting yourself to a safe space.
She may not realise it but verbal abuse is a crime. You are currently a victim of domestic harassment.
Always call 999 if you are in immediate danger and also consider checking out mankind.org.uk for information and support.