A DOM & DUMBER EXCUSE
Dawn NEESOM
SO Barnard Castle is the new Pizza Express Woking, driving to test your eyesight is the new non-sweating and a baldy bloke called Dominic Cummings is ratings busting telly.
Surely the only person who thought the adviser-to-the-pm’s surreal press conference went really well is fellow excuse expert Prince Andrew.
By turn itchy, twitchy and a tiny bit bitchy, Cummings’ attempts to explain his lockdown trip to Durham to stay with his elderly parents while potentially ill with coronavirus did one thing and one thing only.
Taught us more about mpg of a Land Rover Discovery than we ever wanted to know.
Never has a nation obsessed so much about a grown man who dresses like a bag of washing. People are angry, families have suffered. We’ve been unable to say goodbye to dying loved ones, cancelled weddings and struggled to cope with illness, home schooling children and job losses. Because we all stuck to the rules. Rules that were made up by one D Cummings esquire.
His behaviour is the very definition of hypocrisy, do as I say not as I do. Regardless of your politics, his behaviour is inexcusable.
Maybe a little humility or even an apology for causing so much upset to people would have helped. But no, instead he went full blown
Donald
Trump and implied the media were to blame after saying of his behaviour he “didn’t care what it looked like”.
One of Dom’s excuses was that he felt “threatened” in his London home. Hmm. He’s THE top advisor to the Prime Minister – he could and should have requested help from his employers. Child care, security and even walks in bluebell woods would have all been easy to sort. After all, his boss gets to go running in Buckingham Palace gardens!
Nothing about having to drive to Durham for either health or safety reasons rings true. To borrow from Bozza himself Cummings served us an inverted pyramid of piffle. The danger is that others will now claim the Dom the Dumb reason to break all lockdown rules.
Meanwhile, in Northern Ireland a dad was jailed for breaching Covid-19 restrictions by driving 279 miles to collect a puppy he had bought for his autistic son.
Kevin Mcgowan never left his car and was returning on the same day. Most importantly he wasn’t ill and neither was anyone in his household.
This sounds suspiciously similar to Cummings’s excuse that he did what he did because he was “caring for” his son. Funny how only one of them ended up in prison though, isn’t it?
There’s nothing us Brits hate more than being treated with contempt by the ruling elite. One law for them and another for us will always enrage us.
But the one thing you can be certain of is the PM won’t get rid of him.
Because let’s be honest, Boris sacking Cummings would be like Emu sacking
Rod Hull.