DON’T MISS Just Jane
The nation’s top agony aunt
MY new wife walked up the aisle in a dress that made her look like a stripper.
There was so little fabric that the congregation gave out a collective gasp – of horror.
My best man said: “Don’t look!” My granny stormed out.
To her credit, my wife looked stony-faced, while her dad was furious. She joined me at the altar and all I could say was: “Nice shoes.” With that she burst into tears and didn’t stop all day.
She refused to have any photos taken and changed into her “going away” suit as soon as we arrived at the reception. Our marriage started badly and has continued to go downhill since.
Modern
I’m sorry, but my love for her died the minute I spotted that tacky, piece of rag.
I know that probably makes me sound shallow and cruel, but everyone I respect was in that church – all my family, colleagues and oldest pals – and I was completely humiliated.
I’m very ambitious and now my boss thinks I’m married to a woman with absolutely no taste.
She maintains her two best friends convinced her to buy it.
They told her it was a statement – that it was sexy and modern. She says she drank champagne in the wedding shop and got confused about which one she had chosen.
It wasn’t until the final fitting that she realised she’d made a terrible mistake. But it was too late by then because she had no other choices, plus the rag had cost an absolute fortune.
I accept she didn’t humiliate me on purpose, but still don’t fancy or respect her. We’ve never consummated the marriage – the honeymoon was devoid of sex – and I want a divorce.
JANE SAYS: Your poor wife. My heart goes out to her and I beg you to give her another chance. Choosing a wedding dress is an overwhelming experience. No-one wants to get it wrong.
Gowns can be incredibly expensive and, with so many to choose from in all sorts of styles and shades, the temptation to plump for the one everyone else is telling you is perfect can be tempting.
If nerves, champagne and a pair of tricky mates were thrown into the mix, I’m not surprised your wife felt blindsided and confused.
Talking of those mates – just who are they? Why were they so determined to wrongfoot her and send her down such a tasteless path?
I understand you felt disappointed on the big day, but it was just a dress. No-one was hurt. You must have loved your wife enough to carry on with the ceremony.
So what if your precious friends and colleagues snigger about it? Aren’t there bigger things to worry about?
Remember that your wife didn’t set out to upset you.
She’s a good person and you’re lucky to have her.
She’s unhappier than anyone else so patch this up and start again.