He loves a car boot sale more than sex
NO TIME FOR ME, OR BED
MONEY is more important to my guy than sex.
He runs several businesses and if he can make £10, £20 or £100 from selling anything from an LP record to a piece of movie memorabilia, then he doesn’t even see me.
I could be spread naked on the front room carpet and he’d step over me to get to the Post Office before closing time.
He says he loves me and that he’s happy to have me in his life, but cash definitely comes first.
He works seven days a week and that doesn’t leave much time for a meaningful relationship.
Even when we go out for a walk or a drink he’s on his phone checking out potential customers and taking calls. It’s insulting.
Profit
Now we’re slowly emerging from lockdown and he’s promising a fresh start, only I don’t believe he’s capable of changing.
I’m proud he has such a good work ethic and the ability to turn a profit, but am sick of coming in a poor second.
More than once he’s broken off during sex to check his laptop or speak to a contact.
One time we were trying for a baby. It was a Sunday morning and I’d worked out it was my most fertile time. I dragged him into the bedroom and attempted to pin him to the bed for action.
I could tell his heart wasn’t in it when he cried out “Car boot sale!” and pushed me off him.
Later he staggered back with armfuls of stuff he knew he’d be able to sell on for a nice markup.
But it hurt me to realise he was more turned on by the rare 45s and James Bond memorabilia than anything I’d managed to offer him. Am I wasting my time?
JANE SAYS: Your partner is clearly a man on a mission.
Nothing gives him a bigger thrill than unearthing a rare find and selling it on for a profit. But, as with all things in life, it’s better to have a healthy balance. At the moment he has no cut-off.
He works all hours and allows the professional side of his life to bleed into the private. I suspect a lot of us are guilty of doing something similar because bills have to be paid and we don’t know what waits round the corner.
This is an especially worrying time and uncertainty stalks virtually all areas of commerce.
But he has to hear that you need some private time if your relationship is going to survive. You say you are keen to get pregnant, but is he fully supportive of that dream?
If he can’t even hang around long enough to conceive, then could you be wasting your time on the wrong guy?
Ask him if you can organise some date nights and relationship time.
But if he really is incapable of striking that all-important balance because he’s so invested in his business life, then do you need to consider your future?
Will he ever change and be the guy you long for?