I’m a meal ticket for lazy parasite
FOOLED ME WITH HIS LIES
MY boyfriend has got no money and expects me to bankroll him.
In shops he stands back while I pay. He tosses household bills in my direction, saying: “This one’s for you.”
He thinks nothing of taking the credit card out of my purse to pay for pizzas and booze.
He didn’t tell me he was virtually penniless when we hooked up. If anything, he led me to believe he had a good job with fantastic prospects.
He even hinted that he’d get a cash injection when his mum and dad sold the family home.
That was last summer. His parents are now living in a tiny seaside bungalow and my guy hasn’t received a penny.
Sulk
When I ask him about his finances, he changes the subject.
And when I suggest he finds a new job and starts pulling his weight, he goes into a sulk.
How have I allowed this greedy, self-entitled baby to sneak into my space and take over my life? I don’t even like him very much. He’s small-minded, mean and useless in bed.
He never stops boasting about all the women he’s slept with – over 200 if he’s to be believed – yet likes to suggest to me that
I’m lucky to have landed him. My mate’s cousin went out with him years ago. Apparently, she ended up paying him to go away.
Is that my fate? Have I arrived at the age of 32 – having worked like stink since the age of 16 – only to scrape together enough cash to send my shameless, freeloading other half on his way?
JANE SAYS: Your partner may believe he’s landed on his feet. He’s living in a comfortable home with warmth, food and booze on tap, but it’s not your job to carry him.
If he’s not working at all, then are you inclined to help
him back on his feet again? What support can you offer?
If he does have work, but is not paid enough, then what about branching out, retraining or further education?
Ultimately, you have to decide just how much more you’re willing to invest in him in terms of cash and energy.
Does he realise how serious this situation is?
Does he need to have it spelled out to him exactly how angry and frustrated you have become?
Sadly, if your love for him has died and you now resent him, you and he need to start
discussing exit strategies. If you no longer want him living with you, then where can he go? Do his parents have a spare room?
Loving couples traditionally support each other through good times and bad.
But if he’s never pulled his weight or treated you as anything other than a mobile cashpoint, then it sounds as if his luck just ran out.
It was sad that he wasn’t able to be honest about himself and his financial circumstances at the start.
That has now come back to bite him on the rear.