Teen son’s having a child with my ex
FOOLED BY LIAR AGED 35
MY 35-year-old friend pregnant by my son, 19.
I blame her. I’m a single dad and she was supposed to be my mate. I invited her into my house.
I trusted her to be around my son. Now they’re talking nursery colours and she claims she’s done nothing wrong.
Apparently they didn’t start sleeping together until after his 18th birthday and that, if anything, he wooed her. But I don’t believe a word of it.
Settle
is
My lad is lovely, but he doesn’t even know the best brand of baked beans to buy. He can’t manage to pick his dirty underpants off the bathroom floor.
How can he possibly know that he wants to settle down and spend the rest of his life being a dad to this woman’s child?
She bleats about them being in love and says I have to give them a chance. But I don’t see why I have to do anything at all.
I believe their relationship is plain wrong. It crosses a line. I blame myself. I’ve failed him. She and I used to work together. I invited her over after her last relationship ended.
I admit it, I was hoping she’d fall in love with me. We enjoyed a couple of dates, but simply didn’t click on a romantic level. In the
end we agreed we’d be better off as mates. I didn’t think my son would nip in and steal her.
My ex-wife, his mother, left when he was four. She was always too selfish to take our little family seriously. I was supposed to be the good parent.
I was expected to protect my son from predators and now I’ve allowed one to walk right in and make a fool of me.
JANE SAYS: Ranting and raving won’t solve anything.
Your son and his lover are having a baby and that’s the reality. Of course, you’re stunned and shocked, but if
they’ve not actually broken any laws or done anything wrong, then life goes on.
You might not be comfortable with the 16-year age difference, but perhaps he prefers the more mature woman? Maybe she gives him the stability and seriousness that he’s always craved?
The good news is that they’re staying together and planning to give their unborn child (your grandchild) a solid, loving upbringing.
It sounds like they’re committed to each other and that can’t be wrong, can it?
This might not be an ideal
relationship in your eyes, but we live in a far from perfect world. Don’t make yourself the enemy.
Don’t cut out your boy because you’re all in this together. Call a family meeting and negotiate a workable way forward. Park your anger and ask what help and support you can offer.
At the end of this a wonderful baby will be born who will need the love and the energy of all of you. You will have your part to play so take on your responsibility with pride. None of this is the unborn child’s fault.