My secret passion with friend’s mum JANE'S FAB ADVICE LINES Cruel barbs of starstruck girl
BUT IT’LL LEAD TO TROUBLE
MY mate and his mum don’t get on, which is awkward for me as I’m secretly sleeping with her.
Every time I meet him for a drink, he spends an unhealthy amount of time slagging her off.
He complains she is selfish and vain and a terrible mother. He moans that she won’t give him money or allow him to move into a flat she rents out.
He’s furious that she’s got a mystery boyfriend who is “obviously” messing with her head and bleeding her dry.
Filthy
I struggle face…
He’s currently living with his ex-boss, but things aren’t going well. He’s 26 and I keep telling him to stand on his own two feet, but he’d hit the roof if he discovered that not only do I share his mum’s bed but it’s my sister and her mate who rent the flat.
I got close to my lover (his mother) between the lockdowns while he was stuck in Ireland.
She texted me to come and fix her shower (I’m a plumber) and one thing led to another.
The resulting sex was filthy, and we’ve carried on meeting up in private ever since.
This is a serious relationship as far as I’m concerned. But my to keep
astraight mate comes out with some crazy talk after a few drinks. He says he’s going to hunt down the b*****d who is with his mum, hurt him bad and make him pay.
He’s determined to take out all of his frustrations on his secret enemy (i.e. me), but my lover says he’s not being fair.
She’s given him loads of cash and chances over the years, but he’s just an entitled brat. How do I sort this out when he’s so angry he could be capable of anything?
JANE SAYS: Honesty has to be the answer.
Your friend needs to hear from you that you are the mystery man sleeping with his mother. You’re not going to apologise or promise never to see her again because you’re adults and you aren’t doing anything wrong.
You need to prepare yourself for him being furious, but these things happen.
The day you went to her house to mend the shower you weren’t planning to start a relationship, but you suddenly found yourselves attracted to each other.
He may be brattish and entitled, but he’s 26. How come he’s allowed to have a partner, but you’re not? Who is he to ring-fence his mother and forbid her from having fun?
From what you have said, she sounds feisty, sexy and full of life. If you and she are capable of making each other happy, why shouldn’t you enjoy having time together?
Explain to your lover that you plan to come clean because you can’t stand this tension. You and she need to put on a united front.
He may not like the truth, but neither of you can creep around for ever. This is bound to all come out some time and it’s best done in a controlled and mature way.
WRITE to Just Jane, Daily Star, One Canada Square, London E14 5AP or email jane.o’gorman@dailystar.co.uk
MY girlfriend has unrealistic ideas about how I should look. She looks at famous men on TV and in magazines and says: “Why don’t you dress like that?” or “Why don’t you have your hair like this?”
I often feel as if I’m not quite good enough. This is despite the fact I’ve always been happy in my own skin.
JANE SAYS: Have a long overdue conversation with your girlfriend about expectations versus reality. If she believes she’d feel more satisfied with a different kind of man, why is she still with you?
Tell her of your feelings and that you wouldn’t like this to come between you. Is she prepared to drop this and accept you for who you are?