Family grieving loss of dad Sid hit with new blow in horror road accident
HEAD-ON SMASH AS THEY WERE GOING ON HOLIDAY IN A BID TO REBUILD THEIR LIVES
A FAMILY trying to rebuild their lives after a dad died suddenly were hit by further heartbreak when they were involved in a head-on crash which left them with serious injuries.
Burton mum Emma Siddalls, 41, and sons Joshua, 21, Callum, 17, Ethan 16, Alfie, 12 and Logan, six, were going on a much-needed family break after the death of dad Marc ‘Sid’ Siddalls when the crash happened. Emma was travelling with Ethan, Alfie and a family friend in her car. The other sons were travelling with another friend.
Emma, from Stretton, was left with a fractured neck and injuries to her knees, legs and hand and spent four days in a major trauma unit in hospital. Alfie, who attends de Ferrers Academy, in Burton, suffered serious leg injuries and is still having to sleep downstairs as he cannot get upstairs at home. Ethan fractured his collarbone.
Logan, who goes to William Shrewsbury school in Burton, now suffers with post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) as a result of what happened. He was inconsolable on the day of the accident, thinking his mum was dead after seeing her injuries, said Emma.
They were heading to Skegness when the crash happened as they try to come to terms with Sid’s death, which Emma says has left a huge hole in the family and an emotional Christmas.
Burton HGV mechanic Sid was 43 when he died suddenly from a heart condition at home just hours after the family has returned from a holiday in Wales, and the couple were making plans to renew their wedding vows.
Emma said: “We were planning a getaway. Sid was a wonderful party planner and we had some of the best Halloween parties over the years.
“We just wanted to get away from the norm and we were driving along on October 29 to stay in a friend’s caravan. The last thing I remember is receiving a phone call from my friend Becky asking if we wanted to pull over for a break and I said that I was fine and wanted to keep driving. The next thing I’m in an ambulance and they’re trying to take my wedding rings off and I’m kicking off at the paramedics. As far as I’m aware, we had hit a car head-on that was coming the other way. They had to cut me out of the car. My hands ended up going through the steering wheel, with a fractured neck, plus damage to my knees and legs.
“Ethan had fractured his collarbone and Alfie broke his right femur. I was in Nottingham major trauma unit whilst the others had to be taken to Boston hospital. We were there for four nights. I hated the fact that we were all split up. Apparently, Logan kept crying and screaming ‘Mummy’s dead.’ He now suffers from PTSD and had counselling for it.
“I really just don’t know how I can reassure them that everything will be okay. There is nothing I can do to reassure my little boys. I couldn’t do much.”
The family car, a Vauxhall Zafira, which was Sid’s pride and joy and the couple used at their wedding, was written off in the crash near Skegness in Lincolnshire.
Now a friend is raising money to give the family a much-needed treat in 2022 after the terrible year they have had. Sid, who died in June, was the main breadwinner and Emma was a stay-at-home mum so money is now very tight.
She said: “Sid was amazing. We met when I was 17 at a party. We met through a mutual friend. I was at a party and sat on the windowsill with him in the car outside. We used to joke that he met my bum before he met me. We ended up having a party popper fight and that was that really.
“He was amazing and funny. He was truly the life and soul of the party. Just a few weeks before he passed he had his birthday party where he came dressed as a police officer. He wore a pair of boxers and a police badge and that is it.
“He was an absolute prat but I loved him anyway, he was so funny and loveable. A genuinely amazing dad. We got married in 2016 and were together for 22 years.
“We had just had the most amazing holiday in Wales and we had come home that evening. The next morning, I was still in bed and I heard Sid calling me. I went downstairs and he was sitting on the sofa clutching his chest.
“He was telling me that his chest and arms were hurting. He was very stubborn and went into the kitchen to get a glass of water.
“He kept saying there was this burning in his chest like heartburn. I went back upstairs to get my phone and dialed 111, who said they would send an ambulance out. I then heard him shout and I ran back downstairs. He was sitting down in front of the sofa with his knees to his face. He just fell. I was screaming in his face and my son was doing CPR.
“The ambulance arrived and they attempted to resuscitate him. They called it at 8.53am. We laid his body on the sofa so the children could come and see him. What happened next seems like a massive blur to me.
“The coroner’s report told us he died of ischemic heart disease [when the blood flow is restricted]. It really doesn’t make sense as he was absolutely fine, there were no signs he was never out of breath doing anything and he did a lot of heavy lifting for his work.”
Emma said at this point she just wanted to run away as she could not believe Sid had died, especially as the couple spent the day before discussing plans to renew their vows. She said: “I just wanted to run away and pretend it wasn’t happening. I remember the drive back from Wales on the day before we were discussing possible plans to renew our vows.
“They have just done up Dovecliff Hall [in Burton] where we got married and we wanted to do something special. We also spoke about going back to Wales in September. All them plans, all those ideas. They’re just gone. My whole world has come crashing down.
“I mean, I’ve got to be there for the kids but there is nothing I can do physically to stop them feeling the way they are feeling. I just want to scream and shout.
“On the day he died, Callum, who works for a scaffolding company, said goodbye to his dad who waved him off. He got this kind of guilt inside him and I just told him, you got a goodbye, you’re lucky.”
On the day of the funeral, the older children carried Sid’s coffin into Bretby Crematorium after distraught Emma had visited Sid in the chapel of rest each day to say her goodbyes.
She said: “I sat with him for two hours every day and I just needed to do that. In the morning I tucked him in and made him warm and comfortable in the coffin. They took him away and all I could think is he would have done the same for me.
“The boys wanted to carry him in and they did. They made him very proud. Joshua did a lovely reading. Stephen, my brother-in-law was great and would help us around the house. My sister Claire and my dad Tony were fantastic too and have been there every day to help me out.”
Christmas has been very difficult for the entire family, with the children saying the decorations and presents reminded them too much of their dad, even though they had put up fewer than they used to do when he was alive this time.
Emma said: “It was rubbish. Logan was basically going mad saying, ‘Daddy did the Christmas tree.’ Logan wouldn’t have anything to do with Christmas. I think it was when he unwrapped his present of a Nerf gun, he just ran upstairs and cried.
“It was too much for him. It just feels like I’ve now lost my own sixyear-old into his own head. In 22 years I haven’t had a Christmas without him. I feel lost. I don’t know who I am without him. I am trying to be a good mum and I am failing. The accident made Logan a thousand times worse and Alfie is stuck on a bed downstairs as he can’t go upstairs due to the accident.
“I also lost my car which was our wedding car and Sid’s pride and joy. I want to run away and scream.
“There are really no positives and nothing I can say now to help anyone. Everything looks bleak and dull and I have nothing to show for it. I worry now that something else will happen. I don’t speak about it to people much and I have locked myself away. I just felt everything went wrong this year. I just want to be back where we were.”
Now a fund-raiser has been launched online by family friend, Becky Billings who wanted to help her friend out by raising money for a new car. She said: “Emma and her children have so many hospital appointments that she is having to rely on other people to help. Anyone that knows Emma knows that she is the ‘helper,’ not the one to be helped.
“It is my hope that people can help this family, however small. They have had their fair share of misfortune and it would be lovely to show them that we can help give her some independence back and hopefully some money towards replacing the car for all six of them.”
Emma said: “Becky who set up the gofundme has been an absolutely amazing friend and been there every day for me.”
To donate to their fundraiser, go to www.gofundme.com and search for Rebecca Billings.
I feel lost, to be honest. I don’t know who I am without him. I am trying to be a good mum and I am failing. Emma Siddalls