Sedate Willis on life support
Updating the 1974 thriller for a modern audience with action icon Bruce Willis replacing Charles Bronson as vigilante Paul Kearney may have seemed like a good idea on paper.
Throw in the director of Hostel, Eli Roth, behind the camera and a screenplay by Narc writer Joe Carnahan and, at the very least, you would expect some hyper violence and hardhitting drama.
Sadly, though, Death Wish 2018 is criminally dull, dumb and redundant as never mind the original, even the run-of-the-mill Death Sentence and The Brave One did this type of revenger-fuelled story better 10 years ago.
Kearney is a surgeon instead of an architect this time around, but the basic premise remains the same; he embarks on his own brand of justice following a brutal attack on his wife Lucy (Elisabeth Shue) and daughter Jordan (Camila Morrone).
The lack of realism in Willis wearing doctor’s scrubs and operating on patients is the least of the 63-year-old’s problems.
At one point Kearney, when referencing his watch, says, “it’s running a little slow”; he could easily be referring to Willis himself as his mumbling, sedate performance is a world away from swinging off skyscrapers as John McClane.
The speed of Kearney’s transition from surgeon to shoot-first killing machine is jarring and far-fetched and I wish I was kidding when I say he learns everything he needs to know to become a vigilante through TV adverts and YouTube videos.
There’s a weird undercurrent of humour in Carnahan’s screenplay – with Breaking Bad’s Dean Norris’ comedic detective feeling like he’s been parachuted in from a different film and a clumsy Kearney kill evoking thoughts of a more extreme Home Alone – that really undermines the serious subject matter.
The first half of the story also meanders with Kearney’s pointless counselling sessions and a visit to his trigger-happy father-in-law Ben (Len Cariou) holding us back from the real meat of the plot.
Considering Hostel helmer Roth also grossed audiences out with grisly horror debut Cabin Fever, there’s a lack of true bloody violence and gore; bar one uncomfortable scene that sees Kearney carry out impromptu surgery in a garage.
One of the most interesting things about Roth’s latest is the differing stances taken by the media and members of the public on whether Kearney’s violent actions are justified.
Don’t be fooled into thinking Roth is turning philosophical, though; the director is still most comfortable arming his leading man with weaponry and the latter shoot-outs play out well.
But while the original Death Wish spawned four sequels, this clichéd, unimaginative remake is likely to be a one-anddone attempt at a series resurrection.