HOW MUCH IS A PINT OF MILK?
A lorra lorra laughs with Laura Linney.
Which movie have you seen the most?
The Sting. I remember when it first came out, I saw it eight times in a row. I absolutely loved it.
Do you have any notable scars?
Under my chin. I just kept falling over as a child. Didn’t jump far enough off a diving board. Fell on a nail. All kinds of accidents, always hitting the same spot. There’s a criss-cross highway on my chin.
Do you have a nickname?
Yes, it’s Lavro. On my Broadway debut I was so thrilled that my name was going to be on a playbill that I rushed out to get an advance copy. I opened it up and they’d misspelled my name as Lavro. It was a good lesson. Don’t take yourself seriously. So the name’s stuck.
Do you have any tattoos?
Not yet. There’s still time…
What was your role in your first school production?
The first one was a feminist production called
Mrs Claus Takes Over. Santa had a cold and couldn’t deliver the presents, so Mrs Claus steps in to save the day. Yes, I was Mrs Claus. It seemed to be well-reviewed by the other third graders.
How much is a pint of milk?
$4.59. [Empire expresses shock] That’s the price! I’m going to check in my refrigerator to confirm. Just you wait… Excuse me, it’s $5.49. But it’s a quart. It’s seriously expensive. It’s very good milk. At that price, it should be.
Have you ever knowingly broken the law?
Oh no, I’m far too much of a scaredy-cat.
What would you call your autobiography?
No Way Through It But Through It.
Who is the most famous person in your phone?
Maybe Liam Neeson? We’re friends.
When was the last time you walked out of a movie?
I don’t really walk out of movies. I fall asleep instead. That’s my quiet, polite form of protest. “I don’t like this so I’ll make myself unconscious.”
What’s the strangest place you’ve ever thrown up?
Ha! I threw up into a garbage can on a New York street. I’d just seen a former boyfriend who’d just got married. He was someone I was very in love with. He met me to have lunch and all I could do [was] stare at his wedding band. I kept myself together, then we left and I went outside and vomited in a garbage can. It’s was like a bad movie moment.
What one thing can you do better than anyone you know?
I have an incredible sense of direction. Put me in a city I’ve never been to, make me walk a mile and I can march my way back to where I started.
What’s in your pocket right now?
I’m wearing pyjamas. I’m doing a play on Broadway at the moment. The pants aren’t going on until I have to leave the house.
Who did you have on your wall as a child?
Mark Spitz. It was a life-size poster of him wearing all his medals in his little American-flag Speedos.
Have you ever stolen from a hotel?
Yes, a laundry bag that had the hotel signature beautifully embroidered on it. Oh! I guess I did break the law knowingly! So that’s twice now. First I stole the bag, then I perjured myself.
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