TRAILER TALK

Unfiltered, uncensored, uncompromising trailer reactions from team EMPIRE

Team Empire talks about the trailer for Bad Boys For Life. This shit just got realer.

John Nugent (News Editor): Anyone excited for this one?

Aliyah Allen (Designer): I am. I quite like Bad Boys. I prefer the first one, though.

James Dyer (Digital Editor-in-chief ): Yes! I’m a big Bad Boys fan. Bad Boys II,

I’m less fond of.

Chris Hewitt (Re.view Editor): It’s true, Bad Boys II is definitely not a good film. But I do remember there was a bit where a corpse had an erection. That was quite funny.

John: Well, now, people, we’ve got Bad Boys For Life. Which sounds a bit like a threat. Here we go!

Chris: At their age, getting out of a car is going to be a bit tricky. How long did it take to do this shot?

John: This opening shot is pure Michael Bay — a cool slow-motion golden hour tracking shot. And then it’s subverted with some middle-aged comedy from Martin Lawrence.

James: They’re a good duo. Will Smith has charisma to spare and the dynamic he had with Martin Lawrence is the heart of Bad Boys. That’s something that got eclipsed slightly in the second one. Hopefully there’s more of it here.

John: What’s this stuff about “penetration”? Is this a vaguely homophobic joke?

Ben Travis (Online Staff Writer): Is the idea that now he’s old, he doesn’t want to use guns anymore? He wants to talk his way out of things.

John: Doesn’t quite work for me.

Ben: I’m extremely ready for Good Will Smith again. He’s obviously had a really good financial year with Aladdin.

Chris: You sound like a stockbroker!

Ben: But he still looks good with a gun. Chris: This is one of my issues with Gemini Man, though. Today’s Will Smith doesn’t look that much older than Will Smith from 25 years ago! How can you tell the difference? He looks incredible here. Whereas Martin Lawrence has, shall we say, aged.

John: It is good to see Martin Lawrence again, though. Did you guys see The Beach Bum? He has a cameo in that where he plays a dolphin trainer called Captain Wack. It’s incredible.

Chris: I have a lot of affection for him. Obviously, their careers have followed different trajectories, Will Smith and Martin Lawrence. You could argue that Will Smith doing this film is even, perhaps, a favour to his friend. But Martin Lawrence is very funny in this trailer! This trailer has actually made me laugh!

James: Good to see Joey Pants [Joe Pantoliano] back again. Still playing the police captain stereotype, swigging Pepto-bismol.

Chris: The central tension of the movie seems to be about action heroes getting older, and them trying to maintain an image of being cool, even as you slide into your fifties. Martin Lawrence is maybe embracing that a little bit more than

Will Smith. Maybe it’s actually trying to say something?

Jamie Inglis (Deputy Art Director):

He’s talking about retiring. Do you think Martin Lawrence is going to die?

John: Depends on the box office.

Chris: Genuinely thought he was going to miss that ladder for a second.

Ben: Gotta say, it looks pretty nicely shot — lots of visual flourishes, neon lights, Miami sunsets. So many of these action sequels are knocked out cheap and end up looking a bit grey and dull.

Chris: This is Jerry Bruckheimer producing again, right? This feels like the kind of old-school ’90s action flick they don’t make these days, or if they do, they make them badly.

John: We haven’t had a “This shit just got real”-equivalent line yet. I need this shit to get realer!

Ben: “One last time”?

John: That’s very Fast & Furious.

Aliyah: Hey, that’s Vanessa Hudgens!

John: Wow. He’s firing a chain gun from a motorcycle sidecar. What a final shot. I mean, come on!

Ben: It’s like if Michael Bay did Wallace & Gromit!

James: I don’t really need to see Will Smith’s sex face, but sure.

Ben: This is the kind of nonsense I’m in for.

James: I am, having seen this trailer, no clearer as to what that film is actually about.

John: They’re just, y’know, shooting people.

Chris: Who cares? It’s the sort of movie in which the plot is totally irrelevant.

Jamie: I did expect a Taken-like thing — they’re old and they have kidnapped teenage daughters. But there’s no obvious threat. Other than crime.

Chris: There are some bad guys and they have done bad things. But — and we have to make this very clear — the bad guys are different from the bad boys.