The show must go on (and on)

Theatre As epic seven-hour play Angels in America comes to the capital, Susannah Butter has a theatre marathon survival guide

IT’S A common joke among theatre critics that the most heartening words in the English language are “90 minutes straight through”. Length matters. Even the most compelling production can grate if it drags on, especially when Londoners are used to short, sharp bursts of information and are constantly told that sitting down is bad for you.

Nevertheless, the capital has recently gone in for the long haul with epic plays dominating theatres. There’s Harry Potter and the Cursed Child at the Palace Theatre, which is a two-parter, with each instalment coming in at more than two hours 30 minutes, the adaptation of My Brilliant Friend at the Rose Theatre in Kingston (two plays that are both two-and-a-half hours long), four hours of Hamlet at the Almeida, and a two-part Angels in America opening at the National Theatre next month. Each part is three hours and 30 minutes. It’s certainly value for money.

The Standard’s critic, Henry Hitchings, enjoys a long show “but only once in a while”. He says: “My impression is that producers reckon anything much shorter than 90 minutes is hard to programme, but anything over three hours is at risk of being described as bloated and self-indulgent.”

These mega-plays are getting glowing reviews, so if you don’t want to miss out, it’s time to ready yourself for the long run. As the plays get longer, here’s how to pull off a theatre marathon.

The company

The uninitiated may assume that who you watch a play with is irrelevant — you’ll be immersed in the onstage drama and not allowed to talk anyway — but assume at your peril. As anyone who has been stuck next to the wrong passenger on a long-distance flight will know too well, if you are sitting next to someone for a prolonged period of time, every detail matters.

If you are taking a friend or loved one to a show, choose carefully. It’s best if you have similar temperaments and your appetites are in sync. The strongest relationships have floundered over one party wanting to leave at half-time, or being cajoled into staying on, only to ruin the experience for their pal by getting drunk and obnoxiously making snide remarks throughout and/or falling asleep, upstaging the actors with snoring.

Avoid taking friends who are too smart and will want to (over)analyse every plot twist — after five hours watching onstage angst you will crave