How tickled we were by Ken’s jokes

“I haven’t spoken to my mother-in-law for 18 months. I don’t like to interrupt her.”

“You think you can get away, but you can’t. I’ll follow you home and I’ll shout jokes through your letterbox” — when he was still going strong at a show as it approached midnight.

“Honolulu: it’s got everything: sand for the children, sun for the wife, sharks for the wife’s mother.”

“Age doesn’t matter, unless you are a cheese”, on approaching his 80th birthday.

“Doctor, ‘How old are you?’ ‘I’m approaching 50.’ ‘From which direction?”’

“How do you make a blonde laugh on a Sunday? Tell her a joke on a Wednesday.”

“How many men does it take to change a toilet roll? Nobody knows. It’s never been tried.”

“Fifty-five years in show business, ladies and gentlemen. That’s a hell of a long time to wait for a laugh.”

“Tonight when you get home, put a handful of ice cubes down your wife’s nightie and say: ‘There’s the chest freezer you always wanted’.”

“My act is very educational. I heard a man leaving the other night, saying: ‘Well, that taught me a lesson’.”

“So this fellow tells the doctor, ‘Every time I sneeze I feel very sexy.’ The doctor asks, ‘What do you take?’ ‘Pepper’.”

An official went to ask my big Auntie Nellie to come off the beach because the tide was waiting to come in.” QUIZ ANSWERS: 1. Salt. 2. O. 3. Rome. 4.They laid eggs. 5.Whitney Houston. 6. Annie Mae Bullock. Missing link: MACHINE.