Wasn’t himself’

Diagnosis of dementia is a life-changing moment

When Jim Reid, 77, received his diagnosis of vascular dementia four years ago, his wife of five decades, Cath, 75, knew her world was set to change.

Speaking to the Tele to mark National Dementia Awareness Week, she said: “Jim’s whole lifestyle changed – but it changes both of you. You go from just being someone’s partner to their carer.”

In a short time, Cath watched as her husband lost interest in TV, dropped a lifetime habit o f avid reading and stopped gardening.

“I think he knew, long before then, that something wasn’t right,” Cath said.

“As long as seven years ago, when he was 70, he was considering not renewing his driving licence.

“I don’t think he understood what was happening, but he just knew he wasn’t quite himself.”

Since then, Cath, a retired civil servant, has become the head of the household, handling finances and other decisions she once left to her husband.

“You have to suddenly learn to become very organised – and each and every person with dementia is different, so you don’t have a starting point to work from,” she said.

Dementia is an illness t hat affects the brain, making it harder for those who have it to remember things or think as clearly as they once did.

The charity Alzheimer Scotland believes around 90,000 people in the country have the condition, and that it affects one in 14 people over the age of 65.

Understanding of dementia has improved in recent years, to the point that those who have it are able to lead relatively healthy lives.

Jim is among those who does so, despite feeling a little “dottled”, or forgetful, from time to time.

He spends two days a week using Alzheimer Scotland’s resource centre in Stobswell, close to his home.

The charity has scores of resource centres across the country which offer drop-in cafes, pre-planned activities and recreation opportunities for those with a diagnosis.

In Dundee, activities on offer include reminiscing about football at both Dens Park and Tannadice, a monthly meet at the Museum of Transport and arts and crafts.

However, as well as stimulating the mind, these gatherings offer something not commonly associated with dementia – a relief from the isolation a diagnosis can bring. And that doesn’t just mean Jim.

“I can feel very lonely sometimes, even when I’m in the same house as him,” Cath said. “I can be speaking about something and he’ll just miss it and speak about something else.

“I’m very lucky that our two children, Karen and Gordon, and four grandkids all live within the city.

“I can’t tell you how lucky I am to have them – and they work in health, so they understand.

“If it wasn’t for the resource centre and Alzheimer Scotland, I don’t know what I would do.

“You make friends speaking with other carers at the drop-in cafe. You learn to support each other.”

Brenda Stewart, service manager at Alzheimer Scotland’s Dundee resource centre, said a dementia diagnosis doesn’t have to mean a person has to stop enjoying life.

She added: “We offer support here, but it’s also about enabling people to live as well as possible, for as long as possible – and that goes for carers too.

“If we do everything for people we take away those vital life skills, so it’s about enabling them to do as much as they can.”

A DIAGNOSIS of dementia is a life-changing moment – not just for those who receive them, but also for the ones they love.