SIDELINES...

BIG BLUEBERRY

An Australian couple were awarded a Guinness World Record for growing the world’s heaviest blueberry, which weighs 0.57 ounces (16g). The giant berry, grown by David and Leasa Mazzardis, has a diameter of 1.4in (3.5cm). upi.com, 5 Oct 2020.

MYSTERY CASE(S)

Fifty people carrying suitcases were spotted walking towards Ardingly Reservoir near Balcombe, Sussex. Police were called to the popular fishing spot, but were unable to find anything untoward. “An area search was carried out and the team could not locate anyone with suitcases,” said Inspector Darren Taylor. “Most bizarre.” The Argus (Brighton), 26 June 2020.

LONG STRANGETRIP

A Utah man allegedly stole a red pickup truck from a 7-Eleven store so he could rendezvous with aliens, but subsequently felt guilty and returned it. Bryce Jerald Dixon is accused of theft of a vehicle and three attempts to escape from official custody. He told police he needed the truck so that he could “get to the Colosseum to get on a flight with alien diplomats”. He was treated for an injury sustained when the truck owner allegedly punched him in the face. kutv.com, 28 Sept 2020.

CONGRESSMAN’S BOOB

An Argentine politician was forced to resign after being seen kissing his girlfriend’s bare breasts during an online congressional debate transmitted live on the parliamentary YouTube channel. Juan Emilio Ameri told reporters that his girlfriend, who has had recent breast augmentation surgery, entered the room when he thought he was offline. Wanting to see how the implants looked, he called her over. “I kissed her tits, and that was all,” he explained. Guardian, 25 Sept 2020.