Book me into the mother-in-law’s

DOUBLE TROUBLE

FOR A

FIRST TIME DAD OF TWINS

A holiday used to be a chance to recharge the batteries, recoup a sense of self alongside drinking and eating yourself into a relaxed oblivion – but the twins have heralded a departure. It’s still technically a holiday but with a heavy emphasis on activity from 6am to 9pm.

For obvious reasons including cost, risk and general hassle, this year we decided against going abroad.

Fortunately, Victoria’s mother said we could stay in her house for the week. Even better, she wouldn’t be there because she was in a rented cottage a hundred miles away.

We had a free four-bedroom home, which was cleaner and roomier than our own, in a popular seaside resort.

When we arrived, the fridge and cupboards were well stocked, with all kinds of foodstuffs, and I even noticed a selection of interesting beers.

My first thought was we’d struggle to get through all of this in a week, but I consoled myself with the fact, we could always load up the car with anything left over and take it home.

Disappointingly, there wasn’t a bowl of fresh fruit, swan-shaped towels or a free mini bar in our room – and there wasn’t a pool just by the patio doors. Although, this meant neither Victoria or I would have to follow the twins everywhere in case they fell in.

On our last foreign holiday, the pool was outside the back door, which meant the poor things had to wear giant buoyancy aids for the week resembling mini-Michelin Men in all holiday pictures.