‘I’VE LEARNED NOT TO TAKE ANYTHING FOR GRANTED’
Chef Monica Galetti opens up to Nathalie Whittle about being misjudged on TV, the importance of speaking up – and how being forced to slow down this year has made her reassess what’s important
Chef Monica Galetti on how slowing down has been a blessing in disguise
Monica Galetti is no stranger to overcoming hurdles. Born in Samoa and raised in New Zealand, she left home for London aged 23, where she landed a job as commis chef at Le Gavroche under the tutelage of Michel Roux Jr. She rose swiftly through the ranks to become the restaurant’s first female sous-chef and, seven years later, opened her first restaurant, Mere, with her sommelier husband David. The pair are also parents to 13-year-old Anaïs.
But this year, 45-year-old Monica faced a huge hurdle. After weeks of trying to keep Mere afloat amid the outbreak of Covid-19, she was forced to close it in line with government guidelines, putting its future in jeopardy. She says it felt like years of hard work went ‘down the toilet’. Yet, it’s hard to recall a GH cover star who is as upbeat as her. Our shoot, she explains as she sits down for lunch with us, has been ‘such a welcome relief’ from the chaos that has consumed her life over the past six months. ‘And it’s been a while since
I got dressed up,’ she laughs.
As we chat, preparations are in full swing for Mere’s reopening; Monica is due to film the final episodes of the new series of Masterchef: The Professionals, which is moving to BBC One, and in many ways, life seems to be getting back to normal. But the truth is, it’s a ‘new normal’, and it’s one Monica is keen to embrace. Here, she shares how recent challenges have forced her to take a step back and reevaluate what really matters.
What have the past six months been like for you?
The first couple of weeks of lockdown were the toughest. I went from moaning about never having enough time to rest to having nothing to do and I got a bit down about it. I found it really hard to cope and adjust. The key was finding something to focus on. I started baking for our local hospitals and neighbours, which really helped keep me calm. In fact, David and Anaïs got involved, too, and we ended up fighting over who was making what. David would make a cake before I’d even woken up and I’d be like, ‘Why did you do that?
I was going to do a rhubarb crumble today!’
What did you learn from this time?
That I really needed to slow down. I kept saying that I needed to and I was going to, but I never actually did – and this forced me to. Once everything was taken away from me, all I was left with was my family. And it was a bit of a wake up call that I need to put more focus on them and not take anything for granted. I’ve really appreciated having that downtime to reassess everything and what’s important.
Has it changed your perspective?
Completely. Ordinarily, we’re lucky if we have one or two evenings together as a family each week and I’ve always thought, ‘Oh, it’s fine because we’re going to have time together later – a week in August or a week at Christmas.’ But that’s not enough. There’s so much I’ve missed – simple conversations with Anaïs, even just chilling on the bed with her because I’m not having to rush and chase my team for
something. For once, I could actually just sit still and focus on her – and that was so special.
How does it feel to be reopening Mere?
I’m excited but I’m also nervous. The business is a write-off for this year and next due to having to shut for six months, that I know. But all I care about is having enough money to pay my team. If the business doesn’t survive this, I’ll have to lay people off and that’s my biggest worry. I have to make sure it survives.
You have another series of Masterchef: The Professionals coming up, too. Was TV ever part of your plan?
No way! Honestly, the stuff Michel [Roux Jr] gets me into! I was working at Le Gavroche at the time and he told me he wanted to put me forward for it. He said, ‘Just be yourself like you are in here and you’ll be fine.’ I’ll never forget the moment the producer phoned me to say I’d got the job; I was rushing to pick Anaïs up from nursery and I was so nervous that I threw up by the side of the road! The next call I made was to Michel saying, ‘What the hell am I going to do?’
So, you had a lot to learn?
Yes. Television is a funny world. At first, I found the feedback quite harsh; having people judge you and say you’re horrible is difficult. I was being called the Simon Cowell of the cookery world and the female Gordon Ramsay. I mean, what? From all I knew, that was simply part of being a chef; it was the way we talked in the kitchen. I’ve learned to be a bit more careful with my words since then, so people don’t actually believe I’m mean!
Have you become calmer in your own kitchen over the years?
Absolutely. Being a mum has taught me to be so much more patient and to be a better teacher, too. At Mere, we have a lot of fun and that’s important. I like to have music playing in the morning and see everyone enjoying themselves, then at 11am, the music goes off and it’s time to get serious!
Is that something you learned working under Michel?
I have so much love for Michel; he’s like my older brother. But working as a young chef under him was tough. He was very strict – he doesn’t miss a thing – and the hours were insane. There were many moments when I considered giving up, but you struggle through as a team and, believe it or not, Michel knows how to have fun, too. You could have the craziest day, then at 11pm, the head chef starts a water fight in the middle of the kitchen. And Michel catches you in the hallway and he’s got a bucket of water, too!
You’ve climbed to the top of a male-dominated industry. What’s the secret?
You have to enjoy what you do.
I was lucky enough to be in an environment where I was supported from the top, but you also need to stand up for yourself and for others. I’ve been in kitchens (not Michel’s) where inappropriate jokes have been made and you have to use your voice in those situations. The power is in ourselves to say, ‘You know what? That’s actually not cool.’
Have you always been good at speaking up?
Fortunately, my mum was a very strong woman. She had a really tough upbringing in the Pacific Islands and she always said to me, ‘Baby, don’t let anyone step on you. If it feels wrong, you have to speak up,’ and I really took that on board. Sometimes, it’s the hardest thing to do, to allow yourself to be judged, but the feeling you get from knowing you’ve said something when you should have will always outweigh how scary it feels at the time.
Has there ever been moments when you’ve felt overwhelmed at work?
Oh, definitely. When I opened Mere, I went from spending quite a lot of time with my daughter to having four months without a day off. We had to employ a nanny for the first time and I remember Anaïs, who was eight years old, crying down the phone asking when I was coming home. I went to cry in the stairwell and thought, ‘What the hell have I done?’ But I had no choice but to get on and get through it.
How have you managed to juggle it all?
That’s been the toughest part. Being a mum and keeping a foot in the top end of the industry has not been easy. In the beginning, David and I split the childcare between us – when one of us was at work, the other was at home, then we’d swap – but we hardly saw each other. Even then, I suffered from a lot of guilt. Now that Anaïs is 13, she needs me less, but I have this constant fear that I only have a few more years before she’s going to want to go off and do her own thing.
Do you feel her pulling away from you as she gets older?
She will always be my baby, but she’s at the point where everything I do embarrasses her. I’ll go and jump on her in bed and try to kiss and cuddle her and she goes, ‘Mum, it’s so early, get out!’ But she’s also so much fun to be around and I’ll ask for her advice on what clothes to wear – while she nicks mine from my wardrobe!
Would you like her to follow in your footsteps with her career?
I would never force that. She’s very artistic, so we try to nurture that as much as we can, but I want her to be happy and healthy and the rest will happen when it’s meant to. Though I do tell her that eventually she’s going to have to pay my bills!
I used to be so stressed about the littlest things and now I’m like, ‘Do you know what? Things are going to be okay’
You’re also a role model to so many women of colour – how does that feel?
If it means getting more women of colour into this industry, then that’s great. I want other women of colour to know that it’s anyone’s for the taking. Yes, it’s going to be tough to stay strong in the beginning, but anyone can do what I’ve done.
Have you experienced any racism along the way?
Yes, but I think more out of ignorance than straight-up racism. I was at a dinner with a group of women once and I was laughing about something with a friend when a woman across the table said, ‘Oh, that’s what I love about you Asians – you just say it how it is.’ And I’ve been in a kitchen where someone has said, ‘I don’t know what that is; ask the black girl over there.’ And I’m like, ‘Are you talking about me?’ When no one says anything it carries on, so when I hear it happening – whether it’s to me or someone else – I call it out. We all have to.
How do you stay connected to your Samoan roots?
I’m always on video calls to my family back home and I travel there with Anaïs and David when I can. They’re the ones who have kept my feet on the ground over the years. When my siblings see me on TV, they’ll message saying, ‘Girl, I remember when you used to burn the potatoes and now you’re cooking on Masterchef!’ They take the mickey all the time, but I love that.
You met your husband, David, at work, too…
Yes. I wasn’t looking for any kind of relationship when we met, all I was focused on was being this mad career woman. He was the sommelier at Le Gavroche and we started hanging out with the same group of friends and dining out together, and it just happened. A few years later, we got married in Marylebone and Michel threw us a party at the restaurant afterwards.
You’ve been married for 16 years. How do you make it work?
Because we don’t see each other! No, I’m kidding. There’s a lot of trust and love between us. David is the one I trust more than anyone to give me an honest opinion, and he’s the one who calms me down when I’m flying off the handle. We’re yin and yang – I’m loud and he’s calm – but it works for us. He also knows a lot about wine and when to put a glass in front of me!
You work together, too. Do you both find that you tend to bring work home?
Absolutely, but we try not to. We made a deal in the beginning that disagreements at work either stayed at work or we wouldn’t discuss them in front of our daughter. And she always makes a good point of stopping us when we start getting heated! I’ve got better at switching off over the years, too. I used to be terrible; we’d be on holiday and David would have to lock my phone away in the hotel safe so that I couldn’t access it and check my emails.
Has that change come with age?
Absolutely. That and finally getting a bit wiser! I used to be so stressed about the littlest things and now I’m like, ‘Do you know what? Things are going to be okay.’ I’ve always been wanting to do more and achieve more, but my 40s are all about making sure I spend quality time with my loved ones.
What is left for you to achieve?
This year, I was supposed to be creating a new idea for a second restaurant and now I’m thinking, do I even want a second restaurant? Things have definitely shifted for me. I’m releasing a new book in 2021, Monica At Home, which is a collection of all the recipes I’ve made with my family over the years. And now? My priority is doing all the things with them that I’ve postponed.
Monica’s restaurant, Mere, is now open for bookings (mere-restaurant.com). Masterchef: The Professionals will air on BBC One in November