School of thought
our experts eleanor morgan and anjula mutanda answer your mental health questions
‘It’s said that some people develop depression
when they have been through incredibly tough times. I haven’t – yet I still feel really down. Is this a different kind of depression? And how do I stop myself feeling guilty about it when, on the surface, I have a really lovely life? eleanor says:
People do develop depression after distressing periods in their life: bereavement, separation, prolonged illness, etc. Similarly, some people who experience trauma, such as sexual assault, develop PTSD and can experience problems for years afterwards. It can be a very rough ride.
Not everyone who goes through tough times will develop depression, though, and not everyone who experiences trauma will develop PTSD – such are the infinite variations of the human brain. For a start, it is impossible to isolate the precise biological causes of depression. The ‘chemical imbalance’ theories are just not in line with the evidence.
In psychology, the word ‘resilience’ is often used; a person who gets through a very difficult time and doesn’t experience prolonged mental distress may have a greater emotional resilience than the person who goes through something similar and becomes depressed. Resilience is another hard-to-pindown concept, thought to be the product of our upbringing and life experiences.
In modern society, we are very quick to pathologise sadness, but flagging all our negative thoughts and emotions as signs of possible mental illness can do us more harm than good. Is anyone buoyant, productive and cheery 100% of the time? Impossible. It may be helpful to really look at what is going on in your life – any kind of change or looming decisions – that may be contributing to how you feel, although your mindset isn’t any less significant if you can’t isolate anything.
Conversations are crucial if you’re feeling low. Think of the mind like a multi-layered cake, each layer representing someone’s different worries or negative views of their worth. Conversation is the tool we slice them open with and see the inside for what it is. It could be speaking to a GP or therapist, but don’t doubt the power of talking to those close to you. You may be surprised at their responses or the relief you’ll feel.
As for that guilt? Stigma may still linger around who does or doesn’t, should or shouldn’t, be depressed, but such notions are dated. Evidence categorically tells us that there is no such thing as an archetypal depressive. Swans look beautiful and serene on the surface, but under the water their feet are paddling manically.