CHART OF LUST

1. New in JUNG KIM

There are many reasons to watch Kim’s Convenience (Netflix), but Jung with his shirt off rates among them.

2. Non-mover DAISY MAY COOPER

With specific ref to her Instagram feed, which makes a comic art form of the much underrated quality of silliness.

3. Up THOMAS THE TANK ENGINE

Got an epic boost in profile last week following endorsement from the Harry formerly known as Prince. Possibly gutted he can’t claim to be ‘by royal appointment’.

4. Up LAUREN SOCHA

Once of E4’s Mistfits, now of a Derbyshire care home where she’s working full-time again, having been a carer before all the acting.

5. New in ANDRÉ LEON TALLEY FT ANNA WINTOUR

During an interview re his memoir, he said, ‘It’s not vengeful’ but claims: ‘She left me with psychological scars.’

6. Non-mover CARDI B

Got a bikini wax in a face mask while in lockdown. Posed on a terrace with a candyfloss ’do and nails. Is clearly not letting grooming standards fall, oh no.

7. Non-mover NAOMI CAMPBELL

Our fave vindicated germophobe last week announced she can’t leave home without showering, praying and spritzing. ‘Perfume is so important.’

8. New in CHLOË SEVIGNY FT ANDREW CUOMO

Revealed last week that she fancies the New York Governor, increasingly famous on account of his daily corona conferences.

9. New in JOHN TORODE’S FLAMING TEA TOWEL

Caught on a hob during a live segment on This Morning last week, causing much uproar. (We’ll take any drama that distracts from The Big Drama.)

10. New in LUTFI JANANIA

You know how we said last week that quarantine is giving us time to find new objets de lust? Enter Lufti, a New Yorkbased botanical artist. You are welcome.