I’m struggling with all the ‘lockdown baby boom’ headlines. Are we alone in not doing it?

Anna Whitehouse, aka Mother Pukka

If you’ve been in the pandemic scroll hole, you’re unlikely to be up for doing it. Equally, pretending to home-school while arguing over dishwasher salts isn’t the most sensual foreplay.

I find the more pressure you put on doing it, the less you want to. You never want sex to be on a list of ‘things to do’ beneath ‘unblock the shower drain’.

And if I hear one more person talking about the baby boom post-lockdown, I’m going to throw my contraceptives out of the pram. Your mind will flit between death tolls and food slots within a five-minute period. It’s OK to not get your end away in that context.

While my husband and I have navigated miscarriage, redundancy and post-natal depression like Olympians, it’s the greyness we struggle with – quibbling over Key Stage 2 maths is not going to set me alight. My main feeling right now? Being really annoyed at him for leaving his beard trimmings in the sink, yet again. So no, you are not alone.

@mother_pukka