Dads’ Army without Ian Lavender? Unthinkable

IAM sorry, but television chiefs will have to ban any more showings of my favourite political sitcom. The other day I was in the area that is home to the Houses of Parliament and (several times) heard it called ‘Westmin-is-ter’.

This got me thinking about the Dads’ Army episodes, which are coming back.

Did they ever go away, you ask? Aha, but not as reruns this time.

A cast of ageing actors is lining up to shoot a new version of the 1970s Second World War comedy.

I was sorry to hear that Ian Lavender, who played the young Pike, is not included. Couldn’t he have played his own father or grandfather this time around?

Ian went to the same school as me in Birmingham but as the boys and girls were caged in separate buildings, we didn’t share any drama lessons.

I do remember seeing him in Pygmalion, though, at the boys’ school, playing Professor Higgins. He was excellent. Shame he will always be remembered as dopey Pike.

One actress who can definitely take a bow is Anne Gerrard (a member of Proscenium Theatre Company), who took over a part at short notice in Relatively Speaking at the Compass Theatre last week.

She had to take a script on stage, but did such a good job that we forgot she was reading her lines.

It is very difficult to handle props while not bumping into the furniture or losing your place on the page. I’m in awe.

Well done also to the Beck Theatre for bringing fab folk group Show of Hands to Hayes. We are very lucky to have them here as they have sold out the Royal Albert Hall four times and are triple winners at the BBC Radio 2 Folk Awards. Catch them if you can on Monday, November 17 at 7.30pm. TALKING of showing your hand, Russell Brand, who regards himself as intelligent, says proudly that he has never voted. I suggest he goes to live in a dictatorship, like North Korea. Then, when he finds he prefers our freedom of speech (which he certainly makes good use of), he will undoubtedly back our system which – pay attention Brand! – needs voters to keep it afloat.

As journalist and film-maker Michael Moore once said: “Democracy is not a spectator sport.’ It should be tattooed on our foreheads at birth.