Fin­gers in the ears and vests on chests (please)

Harefield Gazette - - OPINION - Ev­ery week BAR­BARA FISHER looks at is­sues that af­fect us all – the is­sues that get you talk­ing. You can join in by email­ing bmail­bar­bara@gmail.com

DOC­TORS should give us more choice in our treat­ments by telling us ev­ery­thing that could go wrong, ap­par­ently. I say…NO, don’t do it! The of­fi­cial idea is that we can then make our own ‘in­formed’ choice, but of course it would also mean that the medic who is mak­ing us de­cide could not then be sued.

The Royal Col­lege of Sur­geons has been ac­cused of be­ing pa­ter­nal­is­tic – even bul­ly­ing – by hand­ing over re­spon­si­bil­ity to us, al­though I do have some sym­pa­thy, as this whole lit­i­ga­tion busi­ness has got out of hand.

But please don’t make us de­cide what’s best for us, just be­cause a few peo­ple abuse the sys­tem.

I liked it when we were given the bare facts and ad­vised on the best course. In 2007 I had two ma­jor op­er­a­tions in a year, and each time the sur­geon read out the ter­ri­ble things that could hap­pen to me, I put my fin­gers in my ears. ‘I don’t want to hear’, I said. ‘I’ve got to tell you’ he said, plough­ing on re­gard­less.

So how much worse can it be if they are plan­ning to ex­tend this aw­ful­ness and then make us de­cide, say be­tween drug treat­ment and surgery all on our own?

They are the ex­perts af­ter all. It’s as daft as MPs let­ting us de­cide on the best way for­ward for our econ­omy on our pocket cal­cu­la­tors.

I don’t even read the la­bels that come with drugs from the chemist. I know if I do, that as soon as I pop the pill I’ll im­me­di­ately think I’m go­ing to vomit and have wheez­ing, cramps and bloat­ing, all at the same time.

I also try not to google any dis­eases which may be wait­ing in my wings, but I do know if it could be se­ri­ous I should go im­me­di­ately to my doc­tor so please don’t con­tact me to tell me off for be­ing an os­trich.

I’ll only have my fin­gers in my ears …

I’VE got my hands over my eyes now af­ter switch­ing on the TV for the morn­ing news and get­ting Lor­raine Kelly ogling men in pants in­stead.

It is quite ridicu­lous that, ever since Poldark shed his vest, a weird sub-cul­ture has sprung up of gig­gly older women act­ing as if they’ve never seen a man in un­der­wear be­fore.

I hope they don’t ever com­plain about women be­ing treated as sex ob­jects by men.

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