DOCTOR’S ORDERS
Child psychologist Dr Amanda Gummer shares her top tips for parents to build strong bonds
INTERACT: Talk to children as you go about everyday life, whether it’s changing a nappy, feeding them or going for a walk. Point things out that you see and copy their actions. Eye contact is really important, as is comforting them when they’re upset, giving them a cuddle and reassurance. Also, tell your child what you’re doing – “I’m getting the cup out of the cupboard,” and: “I’m mashing the potatoes.” The more exposed they are to this language, the more it will help their development.
PLAY: Babies’ brains are making about a million new connections every second. It’s really important that information is positive and healthy. Play face to face with your baby. Blowing bubbles and making faces can help develop mouth muscles and story time is really good. Anything that involves making adults more playful with children is great. Nursery rhymes and “peekaboo!” you can play right from the start. Not all parents get it right first time or feel that bond straight away, but these things will help with that connection.
SCREEN TIME: The Start for Life campaign is looking at the first two years so it is about parents putting down their screens and making sure that they’re interacting with their children, making eye contact and not using screens as babysitters for under-twos. As children get a bit older, screens can have a role to play, but make sure what they’re watching is something educational and developmentally appropriate.
MOVEMENT: As soon as they can move, they will be on the go and by encouraging that, you will help them develop muscles and boost their confidence. It’s important to enjoy the fact that toddlers in particular are really physical. Let them run around, build dens and jump around the lounge by putting the cushions on the floor. Encouraging that physicality is really powerful.
STOP COMPARING: Competitive parenting is the curse of parents today. It’s so hard, especially with social media. This comes back to looking after yourself and feeling confident that the decisions you make are right for your family and recognising that every family is different. Babies don’t come with a manual, but using resources like the Start for Life website can help you make informed decisions. That’s the way to avoid feeling like you have to compare yourself to others. The first smile or giggle, finding time to engage with your baby, that’s your reward.