BOOKSHELF When you lose a baby it’s the loneliest grief G
IOVANNA FLETCHER would seem to have it all; pop star husband, two gorgeous sons – Buzz, two, and one-year-old Buddy – and a hugely successful career of her own as a best-selling author, blogger and vlogger.
But there have been dark days for the bubbly, down-to-earth writer. Diagnosed with polycystic ovary syndrome, Giovanna, who had always wanted a family, wasn’t sure she’d be able to conceive. A year after she and childhood sweetheart, McFly’s Tom Fletcher, tied the knot in 2012, she fell pregnant – but she feared it was too good to be true.
“A few days later, I woke up to blood. Anyone who’s ever experienced that moment knows the paralysing horror that comes with it.”
At the hospital, a scan showed “there was nothing there. No heartbeat. No baby. Nothing. I’d suffered a complete early miscarriage at just over six weeks,” she recalls.
Tom, who had been giving a radio interview, drove to find his wife sobbing on a London street corner, and just held her.
“I’ve heard miscarriage be referred to as the loneliest grief. It is. It’s so insular. So personal. So soul-crushing. The black cloud of grief followed me for a while.”
She retells the story in her new book, Happy Mum Happy Baby, an otherwise upbeat and honest account of her own experience of pregnancy and motherhood.
It’s the first time Giovanna has revealed details of her miscarriage.
“Miscarriage is something that so many people go through, and we go through it silently and don’t talk about it.
“It affected me massively. When you get pregnant, you have years of hopes and dreams that are suddenly born, and when that doesn’t go according to plan, it’s crushing. There’s a silent grief that comes with it because you are told not to tell people about it. It’s like it’s contagious and if you talk about it, it might happen to other people. It’s so lonely.” In her latest book, Giovanna Fletcher gives an honest glimpse into motherhood, including her ‘soul-crushing’ experience of miscarriage and taking a baby on tour with her husband’s band. She tells why the time is right to
Within months, she was like a creche these days. It’s much having the other band girlfriends pregnant again, but it was difficult more chilled out.” on call to talk to helped. Fans have not to be nervous. Despite being a successful never been a problem, she adds.
“I didn’t relax until I got to the author and blogger (she has “I’ve always found McFly fans 24-week mark and you could feel around 800,000 Instagram have been lovely and accepting. them move around. You start followers, and her YouTube “We don’t go out much, anyway. questioning every little niggle,” she content has racked up some 10 We are home birds. When the kids reveals. “But it didn’t spoil the million views), she go to bed, we’re writing and enjoyment. I love being pregnant.” admits to doing all of our work, so
Indeed, her book is an uplifting experiencing a fear we get our heads down read, as she talks about stumbling of missing out and carry on.” her way through motherhood, the since having kids. They socialise with sleepless nights, the crying, “Being a mum, the other band the feeding, the your life members and their uncertainties that she’s completely wives, including doing the right thing. changes. You’re Harry and Izzy Judd,
“Everyone thinks they needed at home, Danny and Georgia know what they are doing you’re not going Jones, Emma and Matt but the truth is, they don’t. out as much, and Willis and the We’re completely winging when you’ve got McBusted crew. it!” friends who are still living the “With the McFly guys, we all
When Buzz was 10 life you were once a part of and hung out and had this life together months old, they followed they’re all out having a great time, when we were kids ourselves, and Tom on tour to Australia. it brings home the fact that life has now that we’ve seen them get “The thought of Tom not being changed in a major way.” married and have kids, it’s nice to around for three weeks and not She’s made an effort to keep the be part of the next chapter.” seeing Buzz wouldn’t have worked romance alive with Tom. Giovanna will team up with Tom for our family. It would “I make sure we have date professionally later this year, for have been miserable. If nights, going to the cinema or the live version of his festive book the situation allows it, theatre, probably once a The Christmasaurus, in which it’s lovely for them to month. It’s important to they’ll be singing together. be part of the world have that time, to have “He’ll be telling me off because and see places and some adult conversation.” he’ll be in charge. I’m going to be be part of those Giovanna, 32, whose bossed around,” she says, memories. brother is TOWIE star laughing. Joking aside, she adds:
“People always Mario Falcone, first met “Having children has definitely think being on tour Tom at Sylvia Young strengthened our relationship. is much more Theatre School We’re a proper family unit. rock and roll when they were “We tackle things together, but than it 13, before he things kind of changed when we actually is. found success in got married. I know people say
“The only McFly. marriage doesn’t change anything, boobs out She has but for me, I found it really did. It backstage admitted that unified us in so many ways. are probably she used to “We’d been together for so long mine! worry about but marriage added this extra layer There’s no girls flinging that I wasn’t expecting,” Giovanna sex, drugs themselves at reflects. “I thought we were and rock ’n’ her pop star completely solid anyway, and then roll. It’s more husband, but we got married and it became this knowing he whole other thing.” loves her and Happy Mum Happy Baby: My Adventures In Motherhood by Giovanna Fletcher is published by Coronet, priced £16.99. For book tour details, visit giovannasworld.
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