Left out the hoop with latest humorous gags

DO old jokes stop being funny? Or is it the way I tell ‘em? I was at the bar with Wimps, who has the entire Tommy Cooper joke book tattooed on his heart, and Jimmy from Liverpool, the city that has produced more comedians than anywhere else in the world. They were exchanging gags as if playing ping pong but when I joined in, all I got were blank faces.

Was it because mine was from a different era?

Little Billy came from a poor background and never had any toys. For his birthday, his dad made him a hoop and stick. He was delighted and ran up and down the street, hitting the hoop with the stick to keep it going. He was so pleased he took it for a run to York, leaned it against a fence while he went to the loo and, when he came out, it had been stolen. He went to the police station to report the theft but the desk sergeant said it was unlikely it would ever be recovered and Little Billy began to cry.

“There, there,” said the policeman. “It’s only a hoop.”

“Yes,” said Little Billy, “but how am I going to get back to Huddersfield?”

For which I received not a titter. Had the joke gone past its fun-bydate? Did humour only apply to its own era?

How about this Victorian riddle? Who is the greatest chicken killer in Shakespeare? Macbeth because he did murder most foul. All right. Please yourself.

Or the garbled military message that originated in the First World War? An officer at the front sent runners to tell command: “Send reinforcements, we are going to advance.”

By the time it was delivered it had become: “Send three and four pence we are going to a dance.”

Gags have been around for ever and, a few years ago, Dr Paul McDonald of Wolverhampton University undertook research to find the oldest jokes in the world.

“What they all share is a willingness to deal with taboos and a degree of rebellion,” he said. Oh yes, and some are quite vulgar.

Two thousand years ago, folk in Ancient Rome were chuckling at the expense of the Emperor Augustus. The Emperor saw a man in the crowd who looked just like him. He said: “Did your mother ever work at the palace?” “No your Highness,” said the man. “But my father did.”

The oldest he found came from Mesopotamia in 1900 BC, almost 4,000 years ago: “Something which has never occurred since time immemorial: a young woman did not fart in her husband’s lap.”

I prefer my hoop joke.