Man shunned after reporting sexual abuse wants others to speak out

HE WAS CALLED A LIAR, BUT NOW WANTS OTHERS TO KNOW THEY CAN SPEAK OUT ABOUT SEXUAL ABUSE

“THE feeling of knowing someone couldn’t keep their hands to themselves and had to do that to me has ruined my life and there’s no going back from it” – that is the harrowing ordeal faced by a Hull man who has spoken out about being sexually abused as a child at the hands of someone he knew.

He has told the story anonymously in a bid to encourage others who have been the victims of abuse to speak out and get support.

On Boxing Day 2011, his demons led him to attempting to take his own life, having previously tried to get help, only to be “shunned”.

The man, who is now 22, admits he feels “shame, embarrassment and anger” at the abuse he faced over a “long period of time”.

He says he was branded “a liar” over his claims.

You can read this emotional story in his own words:

The abuse carried long period of time locations.

A definite age isn’t something I can remember but from some digging into past occurrences, about a sexual comment I made to my friend when I was younger, my friend’s mum remembered this incident but not in full detail. But when I asked her how old I was when that comment was made, she informed I was between six and eight years old.

When I first reported this, I was shunned away, told I was a liar and subjected to neglect. I was put in a respite care home when my mum was dying of a brain tumour, but on over a at numerous knowledge of the abuse wasn’t known to anyone until I turned 14.

When I opened up about the case, I had recently tried to kill myself by overdose on Boxing Day 2011. It was the first year without my mum and a wave of emotions came over me, thinking about everything that has happened in my life and it had finally defeated me. I often think, to this day, about doing it. The feeling of knowing someone couldn’t keep their hands to themselves and had to do that to me has ruined my life and there’s no going back from it.

I haven’t seen him since the abuse took place, but knowing he hasn’t been convicted, living his life as normal with a child of his own puts me at unbelievable discomfort knowing that a predator can be allowed to live a happy life knowing exactly what he’s done.

It leaves me with shame, embarrassment and anger. It’s a bundle of mixed emotions. Losing my mother as a young teen impacted me a lot and I never had the courage to speak about it to anyone until I found comfort in opening up to my girlfriend at the time.

She betrayed my trust for my best interests and confided in her mother about it, which led to the police being notified around new year in 2011. Imagine how many other children are out there, not getting the justice they deserve because evidence plays a vital part. That vital part can ruin a child’s full perception of a happy life, I know that on a first-hand basis. I want every child to know that it’s okay to talk, it’s not their fault.

The sad thing is, I don’t feel comfortable. I’ve just learnt to deal with it in a better way. There’s nothing I could wish for more than justice to be served and even still, I don’t think I’ll ever have peace of mind as this has been an unresolved issue for the best part of 15 years.

When I first reported this I was shunned away, told I was a liar and subjected to neglect Abuse victim