Your entertainment will not begin shortly
Do you ever go to the cinema and wonder when the film you have paid to see is actually going to start? That was the question a member of the Nuts and Bolts team asked himself when he went to watch Everest at Ashford Cineworld the other evening.
The film was scheduled to start at 5pm so he dashed away from work and settled down in his seat at about 4.55pm to enjoy the blockbuster about mountaineers attempting to climb the world’s highest mountain.
But by the time all the trailers, promos, adverts and so on had been shown, he could have reached Everest base camp himself as the film didn’t actually start showing until 5.25pm.
Now everyone likes a little taste of forthcoming films, but some of the trailers are so long it’s almost like you don’t need to bother even going to see the actual film when it comes out as you’ve already seen all the good bits.
Contrast his visit to Cineworld with a trip he and his partner made to the Woodchurch Film Society last Saturday evening to see The Theory of Everything, the excellent film about scientist Stephen Hawking.
Now at this screening there were no trailers, just a brief introductory talk from one of the organisers about the film to be shown.
And one of the delights of Woodchurch Film Society is that it has an interval halfway through allowing cinemagoers to enjoy a cup of tea or coffee and a slice of excellent home-made cake before settling back in their seats for the second half of the film. And, tickets are just a fiver!
Give that group an Oscar. And if you fancy seeing a film in Woodchurch, visit www. woodchurchfilmsociety. com for details of future screenings.
Ever told a little white lie about where you live? If so don’t worry about it: loads of us do it, apparently.
According to a new survey (oh how Nuts and Bolts loves a good survey), 48% of Britons bend the truth about where they live, with a further 19% completely lying about where they reside.
This poll says Britons who lie about where they live are likely to do so because their area has a bad reputation, no one’s heard of the place or they’re ashamed to live where they do.
So perhaps you’ve met some people on holiday, for example, and during the conversation you’re asked: “And where are you from then?”
And in that moment of madness, rather than say Ashford you think it might be better to say: “A little village outside Ashford in Kent called Mersham. You know, pretty little place. Just a village shop, couple of pubs. Rather quaint, actually.”
And then you just hope upon hope that your new ‘friends’ don’t know someone who really does live in Mersham.
So what makes Brits either bend the truth or completely lie to potential partners and people they meet for the first time about where they live.
Well, apparently more than one third of the people surveyed said they lied about where they lived because they didn’t like the town, city or village.
The top five reasons giving for lying were: 1. Where I live has a bad reputation – 44% 2. Nobody has heard of where I live – 37% 3. I’m ashamed of where I live – 35% 4. The surrounding area is much nicer – 20% 5. I live in a wealthy area and don’t like broadcasting the fact – 7%
But of course none of the N & B team would ever lie about such things because – as journalists – we all live in luxury, in huge mansions, in posh villages, surrounded by legions of domestic staff, eating out in flash restaurants, which we drive to in our topof-the-range cars, and we enjoy expensive holidays in places like Barbados or St Tropez, where we spend wads of cash on champagne and caviar. Honest!
They’re back! The people who insist on splitting the second half of phone numbers are at it again.
The Kentish Express has had several examples recently of people who insist on dividing the latter half of phone numbers in two.
Just to clear things up, our office phone number is 01233 623232. It is NOT 01233 623 232.
We’ve highlighted this inappropriate division of phone numbers before, and now we have to issue a final warning.
Anyone who emails us with a divided number will NOT get called. You may think that’s petty but standards are standards and we don’t want our six-digit phone numbers tampered with in this underhand way.
At railway stations people are reminded to “mind the gap”. In this case, yes, we do mind the gap; we mind the gap being there. We demand a gapless society where all telephone numbers are treated equally and with respect, no matter who is dialling them and for whatever reason they are being called.
Nuts & Bolts holiday destination of choice – Barbados
Any visit to the cinema inevitably involves endless adverts and trailers