More seats for a haircut than a train ride

It’s the time of the year when newspapers look back at what’s happened over the past 12 months. But, as is now traditional, Nuts and Bolts has decided to review the year that never was ... looking at things we wished had happened (or on second thoughts perhaps didn’t wish for) in Ashford during 2016 – that never materialised.

So welcome again to the year that never was, and reflect how fantastic it might have been. Southeastern decides to run its trains even faster on the high speed line and also doubles the number of carriages on each train to ease overcrowding. It’s now Ashford to St Pancras in 20 minutes and everyone who has paid for a seat gets one! The number of hairdressing salons and barbers in Ashford town centre finally breaks the magic 50 barrier. Tesco and Poundland both announce plans to open another store in Ashford ... three each just isn’t enough. A ban on the overnight parking of all lorries within a 10-mile radius of Ashford town centre is introduced. The new extension to the Ashford Designer Outlet opens. Crowds descend on the 40 new shops and restaurants. Traffic is gridlocked as thousands of cars fight for parking spaces. Ashford’s supermarkets unite to ban people talking on their mobile phones at the checkouts or swiping through trolleyloads of food at the ‘basket only’ tills. The Eureka Leisure Park in Rutherford Road announces plans to double the size of its car park. No more driving round for half an hour looking for a space, then! Ashford Borough Council goes old school and the authority’s Cabinet members will now simply be the chairman/ woman of planning (or whatever committee) instead of the portfolio holder for environmental reorganisation and cultural integration. Pubs across Ashford unite to ban the smoking of e-cigarettes inside their premises. Nonsmokers breathe a sigh of relief as they can now breathe without inhaling a lungful of vapour. The Op Stack lorry park opens – to the joy of many Ashford drivers and residents and the dismay of Stanford residents who picket the entrance as the first HGVs roll in. Kent County Council announces plans to paint the Eureka Skyway bridge across the M20 pink.

A KCC spokesman said: “As the bridge was scheduled to be cleaned we decided to change the colour from white to pink to make the landmark structure even more of a feature for Ashford and motorists who drive past it.” Primark opens its doors to customers in the former BHS store in County Square. The shop is swamped with thousands of bargain-hunting customers keen to snap up Christmas presents and festive jumpers.

As we move rapidly towards the start of 2017, the Nuts and Bolts team wishes all readers a happy and successful year.

Picture: istock There should never be a shortage of places for a haircut or styling in the town – finding a parking space is another matter