I was suicidal and learnt you just have to talk to someone

Sixteen-year-old from Canterbury, speaks candidly about his battle with mental health issues and how increased funding cuts are making it harder for people to get the help they need

As most of you will be aware, the British Red Cross has declared the NHS as being in a “humanitarian crisis”. Now whether that exact wording really hits the nail on the head is neither here nor there, but what is undeniable is that the NHS is struggling like never before.

This struggle is epitomised by its dealing with mental health issues – specifically with regards to sufferers under 30, the age bracket affected by 75% of diagnoses.

I’m going talk about my experiences, but this isn’t really about me, it’s merely highlighting the problems faced up and down the country.

Every year, almost 7,000 people commit suicide in the UK – a number that is on the up.

While reasons for suicide are vast and wide, a key factor in the majority of cases is that of an underlying mental health issue; an area which, despite government pledges, sees its funding cut year-on-year.

The issue society is facing, in general, is that often people don’t know how to broach the topic of mental health and, increasingly, those affected also don’t know how to go about getting help.

About 16 months ago, my GP referred to me to the Child and Adolescent Mental Health Services (CAMHS), yet it was 13 months until I received an actual appointment.

During that time, I tried to take my own life twice, but I didn’t tell anyone about it for a long time.

I think the primary reason for not saying anything was that I didn’t really want to cause a fuss but also, it’s hard to drop it into a conversation.

The thing about conditions like these is that, despite the fact that anyone can be affected by them, there is a very real stereotype surrounding how they should act and what they should look like.

You know, dresses in black, has a funny fringe and listens to bands like Weezer (I had to Google them).

But that’s simply not the case. Take me, for example. If you asked people to describe me, I suspect depressed would be pretty low on their list.

Bubbly? Like a can of Coke. Funny? Depends who you ask. Loves Little Mix? Absolutely. Won’t stop talking? Included on my school reports more times than you could imagine.

Like I said earlier, the issue is not helped by the fact that over half of NHS trusts are having their mental health budgets slashed, despite claims of increased investment.

Around a quarter of us will suffer from a mental health condition in our lives – whether it’s for three months or constantly in the background – and this number is increasingly alarming in today’s youth, the under 30s.

So, it leaves the question hanging in the air: “Why doesn’t the government do more to help?”

Let’s be honest, pain is inevitable in life, as is failure, but what counts is how we bounce back – that will define us.

None of us are the same, but we are all connected in the sense that we will all suffer from a sense of failure in our lives.

It’ll hurt in different places and we’ll be broken by different things but the feeling is the same.

We’ll lose hope, drag our head down, shut ourselves away from the world.

What unites us is our common imperfection in striving for greatness and yet that very same thing is the one which we will never admit.

All anyone wants is validation, but not everyone will find it. What matters is the value that others prescribe to us rather than our own feeling of self worth.

But when you struggle to find that, you begin to lose grip; you focus on the negativity around you and the further to the edge you get, the harder it is to hold on. So, what should we do? Well, obviously, it’s different for everyone and I can’t say ‘this is what you have to do’ because not everything works for everyone.

But, simple as it sounds, you’ve just got to speak to someone. Whether it’s your best friend, or just some doctor you’ve met for the first time.

If you get it off your chest it’s not all going to suddenly go away, but it will help. I suspect this is one of the only times when that age-old adage of “a problem shared is a problem halved” actually has any real bearing.

More importantly, know who your friends are because they will have your back when you feel as though it’s all going wrong.

Hope over despair, love over hate, the future will be bright.

If you would like confidential support on an emotional issue, call Samaritans on 116 123 at any time