‘Have difficult conversations’

Sukina Fagg describes “her daughter as a “kind, sassy, bossy, beautiful girl”. Emilia Marsh - who worked at Canterbury Academy and was known as Millie - tragically took her own life at her family’s home in Boughton-under-blean on November 3 last year, at the ageofjust20.

“She was just the most amazing person,” says her mum.

Sukina describes the year since Millie’s death as “horrific”.

“People say there are ripples from losing somebody,” she said.

“When you lose someone to suicide, there’s a tidal wave. It affects everybody. Millie’s friends, sisters, me, her dad.

“I’m a completely different person to the one I was on November 2, 2020.”

Sukina worries that people in the county are let down by “lacking” mental health services.

“In my opinion there needs to be a whole overview of mental health services in Kent,” she said.

“Because it’s absolutely lacking. Particularly with young services.

“We’re losing children, young adults, older adults, men, everybody, at colossal rates.”

But Sukina stresses there are “amazing” organisations across the county that offer help.

Since Millie’s death, Sukina has learned of and raised money for many charities she was not aware of when her daughter was struggling with anxiety and depression.

She attends a monthly bereavement group in Canterbury run by charity SOBS - Survivors of Bereavement by Suicide - which has groups across the UK. She also encourages people to make use of organisations such as Samaritans.

“I’ve been taken to the depths of despair since losing Millie,” she said.

“I know that sometimes you don’t want to talk to somebody you know. Sometimes you can’t see a way out, but talking to a stranger who’s trained can really help.

“Tell people how you’re feeling. Don’t keep it to yourself.”

Sukina also urges parents to speak to their children about mental wellbeing.

“Don’t shy away from having that conversation,” she said.

“It can be really difficult as a parent to hear that your child is having thoughts about ending their life, but by having that conversation you could save it.

“If you’ve got a child you’re worried about, reach out to charities like Papyrus and Young Minds and get support, ask them how you can help.”

She adds: “My biggest message to anyone struggling is that you are enough.

“You make someone happy, even if you don’t feel like you do. And they want you here.”

Picture: Sukina Fagg Sukina Fagg with her daughter Millie