OLLIE'S TOP TEN

Everyone loves an Ian Holloway quote, so here are ten of the best:

10. “Apparently it’s my fault that the Titanic sank” – on criticism from Plymouth fans 9. “I don’t see the problem with footballers taking their shirts off after scoring a goal? They enjoy it and the young ladies enjoy it too. I suppose that’s one of the main reasons women come to football games, to see the young men take their shirts off. Of course they’d have to go and watch another game because my lads are as ugly as sin” – on the new rule restricting footballers from removing their shirts during a match 8. “I love Blackpool. We’re very similar. We both look better in the dark” – his unusual comparison with the seaside town 7. “Paul Furlong is my vintage Rolls Royce and he cost me nothing. We polish him, look after him, and I have him fine tuned by my mechanics. We take good care of him because we have to drive him every day, not just save him for weddings” – on his veteran QPR striker 6. “If he’s only worth £4million, then I’m a Scotsman called Mctavish” – on bids received for Blackpool captain Charlie Adam 5. “It’s all very well having a great pianist playing but it’s no good if you haven’t got anyone to get the piano on the stage in the first place, otherwise the pianist would be standing there with no bloody piano to play” – on being criticised for using defensive players in midfield 4. “I am a football manager. I can’t see into the future. Last year I thought I was going to Cornwall on my holidays but I ended up going to Lyme Regis” – on whether QPR would be able to beat Manchester City 3. “If you’re a burglar, it’s no good poncing about outside somebody’s house, looking good with your swag bag ready. Just get in there, burgle them and come out. I don’t advocate that obviously, it’s just an analogy” – Holloway tries to dig himself out of a hole 2. “Every dog has its day, and today is woof day! Today I just want to bark!” – Holloway after securing promotion to the Championship with QPR 1. “To put it in gentleman’s terms, if you’ve been out for a night and you’re looking for a young lady and you pull one, some weeks they’re good looking and some weeks they’re not the best. Our performance today would have been not the best looking bird but at least we got her in the taxi. She weren’t the best looking lady we ended up taking home but she was very pleasant and very nice, so thanks very much, let’s have a coffee” – on an “ugly” QPR win against Chesterfield