Woman’s suicide after affair with a married man ended
‘IF I CAN’T LIVE WITH YOU I CAN’T LIVE WITHOUT YOU’ EVENTS PLANNER, 25, TOLD HER LOVER
AN events planner who dreamed of having a house, husband and stable career by the age of 25 killed herself after she was left heartbroken by the break-up of an affair she was having with a married man, an inquest heard.
Emily Henthorn, 25, had harboured hopes of moving into a house with Andrew Hardman and settling down with him after they began an illicit romance when she helped plan weddings and christenings at a masonic hall.
But when Mr Hardman confessed to his wife to having a mistress, he ended his five-month affair with Miss Henthorn.
During a subsequent conversation, a devastated Miss Henthorn told Mr Hardman: ‘If I can’t live with you, I can’t live without you’’ and even asked if she and his wife could ‘share’ him.’’
Just days later, on May 7 this year, Miss Henthorn, from Leigh, was found dead in bed by her father. She had left several suicide notes for her family.
The hearing was told Miss Henthorn met Mr Hardman in October last year and it is thought the pair began an affair in January. During the relationship they began house-hunting together and saw several properties.
Mr Hardman told the Bolton inquest: “At first we were nothing more than acquaintances or friends, but a short time later friendship turned into a relationship and that relationship carried on for about five months.
“There had been an intention to live together and on April 27 I told my wife about the relationship. But following a discussion with her we decided to resurrect our relationship and I ended the relationship with Emily.
“I saw her when she was working at the hall but she said words to the effect of ‘if I can’t live with you, I can’t live without you.’
“I tried to calm her by saying: ‘you didn’t want to do anything silly’ and persuaded her she had a life to live. But when I spoke to her on Saturday May 2, by phone she said ‘without you my life is not worth living’ and repeated it.
“She seemed very calm but I was concerned about her and I rang her dad to say I was concerned. I also rang mental health services and the police and phoned Samaritans as well and left a message.”
Miss Henthorn’s father Darren said: “She was determined, single-minded, strong-willed and at times controlling but she was very independent. “Emily had been suffering from mental health issues for about four to five years and her issues then brought her into conflict with other people and members of the family and those close to her. If things weren’t going her way things would flare up.”
In the days after the break-up, Miss Henthorn phoned her sister threatening to take her own life and police and paramedics were called to her home. But no action was taken after she insisted she was fine.
Amy Corrigan, a friend of Miss Henthorn, told the inquest she had made contact late one evening. She told her friend, ‘I am ending my life tomorrow - if there’s anything you want to say to me, say it now before it’s to late.’
She contacted the emergency services straight away. Mr Henthorn said: “Emily was a very complicated person. I don’t know myself whether threats she made were for show, sympathy or to get attention or whether she did mean them. Seeing as that is the way she ended her life perhaps they where real.”
Recording a conclusion of suicide, coroner Alan Walsh said: “She was someone who was clearly devastated in the conversation she had with Amy and was quite clear she was intending to end her life.”
I don’t know whether threats she made were for show or to get attention, or whether she meant them Emily’s father