‘Safe Spaces was like a safety blanket for me’
REHANA† REVEALS HOW SHE GOT HELP AT A LOCAL SUPERMARKET WHEN HER EX-HUSBAND STARTED FOLLOWING HER
I don’t think I fit any of the preconceived ideas people have of someone who is a victim of domestic abuse and honourbased abuse. I’m 47 years old and I’m a bank manager. But the truth is that for years I didn’t admit I was in an abusive relationship – I think that was because I went into survival mode. Now I think, ‘You are an intelligent woman, how did you not realise for so long?’
People think of domestic abuse as physical, but in my case it was the way my ex-husband controlled my life. I was so used to his restrictions, such as not being allowed to see my family, that I just accepted them.
As my three children got older they started asking me things like, ‘How come Dad is allowed to do things and you’re not?,’ and I realised how abusive the relationship had become.
One time he did physically grab me and throw me to the floor and that’s when I got support and he left our home. Although I had a restraining order against my ex-husband, he started to turn up in my local area, which was very frightening. One day when I was doing my local shop, I bumped into him and when I went to leave the supermarket, I noticed he was waiting outside in the car park.
I knew that Morrisons was in the Safe Spaces scheme so I felt confident in asking for help. The manager and staff were brilliant – they extended my parking and let me stay as long as I needed to.
Safe Spaces was like a safety blanket – I knew I would be safe and that the staff would believe me and were trained to help. My advice to anyone else going through something similar is if you need help, go to a Safe Space, don’t hesitate – you will be believed and they will help you.
The truth is that for years I didn’t admit I was in an abusive relationship Mum-of-three Rehana