Best of British: Ted Simon
Much-loved author of Jupiter’s Travels inspired a thousand round-the-world trips
‘I decided to travel by bike… but didn’t even have a licence’
‘I was stuck in a Brazilian jail and worried they’d send me home’
Ask any adventurer what inspired them to pack up their panniers and explore the world on two wheels and one name will invariably be mentioned - Ted Simon. Immortalised in his book Jupiter’s Travels (which does use dated language in places), Ted’s epic 63,000-mile journey around the globe took four years and has earned him, and his 500cc Triumph T100, legendary status. Now 89, Ted regales his amazing story to MCN. “I was 42 and, after stepping back from a career in journalism, I realised that I hadn’t really seen anything yet. So in 1973 I decided to go and see the world. I chose to travel by motorcycle because I thought it would make it interesting, both for me and for the people who’d read the book I was going to write about it. I had no idea if anybody had ever done anything like it before. I didn’t even have a motorcycle licence.
“There were no dual-purpose bikes back then, it was just a question of choosing between BMW and one of the three British brands. BMW didn’t seem interested, but Triumph were very keen, even though they were in trouble – my bike was actually one of the last out of the factory. We had a meeting and agreed the modifications that they were going to make. But none of that happened and the bike I got was absolutely standard. Oil started leaking almost as soon as I got on the road, but it actually lasted extremely well for the journey. “Looking back, I’m astonished how we ever got anything done. Without the internet you had to go to places or call someone to get any information. If you did use the phone, there would always be someone you could talk to - in those days people took communication much more seriously than they do now. I took six months preparing for the journey, and it was three months before I could persuade the Sunday Times to support me. Harry Evans, the editor, was also riding a bike at the time and he kept me going for the four years.
“I never questioned that I wasn’t going to do it. Come hell or high water, I was absolutely determined. I soon realised that I might easily die in the attempt, because it takes a while to train yourself to become a good defensive rider and somebody nearly killed me before I’d even left France! For the first three months I was just shit-scared of everything, trying desperately to learn how to stay out of trouble, and it wasn’t until I got to Egypt that I began to think that maybe I would be able to survive this. It was a lot to learn and
I didn’t have a lot of time to learn it. “The Michelin maps I used were pretty accurate, but there were places where it was difficult to know if it was going to be a road or just a sandy track. There was one part of Ethiopia, the Atbara Desert, where I couldn’t do more than 50 miles a day. I tried to stay in sight of a bunch of trees that were presumably along the side of a river, but I couldn’t get close to them because the sand there was too soft. I’d already fallen off several times and found that my water can had bust and the little bottle that I had as a back stop was actually full of battery acid. I’d used up almost all the petrol and there was no way
I was going to get where I needed to go. All I could do was just go on… Then somehow I found myself at a school where they treated me like a king and I spent several days there being given royal treatment.
“In times of adversity, the only thing that kept me going was the knowledge that I had to - there was no choice. Even when I was in a Brazilian jail [on suspicion of being a spy] my worst fear was that they’d send me back to the UK - the one thing I didn’t want to happen. “My advice for anyone thinking of doing it also applies to many things in life - say as little as possible and be very patient – don’t be in a hurry to get anywhere.”