SKIP A BEAT
FUNCTION MEETS FORM A hybrid of classic style and digital expediency, the concept of the horological smartwatch is one many struggle to reconcile, designed as they are to be simultaneously good looking and high performing. We challenged an MH writer to ta
MH tests the highend tech watch designed to tick off all functions
Mechanical purists tend to view smartwatches as plastic-fantastic novelties, but proponents argue they should just get with the times. According to Forbes, the wearables industry is now worth $14 billion a year – a figure which is difficult for any watch brand to ignore.
The principal appeal of a smartwatch is, of course, easy access to information – whether that’s tracking your physical activity or keeping one eye on your emails. But as an object of desire, display of craftsmanship, or even a genuinely functional fitness tracker? Two years after Swiss watchmakers first dipped their collective toe in the smart market, the jury still appears to be out.
Some are less equivocal, however. Mark Toulson, head buyer at Watches of Switzerland, has plenty of praise for the traditional watch maisons raising the bar in the field. “TAG Heuer, and to an extent Mont Blanc, are the only Swiss luxury brands to produce anything really interesting,” he says. “The modular aspect of the TAG’S latest model is exceptional; each component part can be unclipped, making it easy to customise. It excels in functionality, too. Google voice command, GPS, Translate – they’re great features that make your life easier.”
So, keen to determine whether this shrewd marriage of aesthetics and multi-functionality is one of true love or simply business convenience, I sought to put the Connected Modular 45 – TAG’S second-generation smartwatch – to the test. And the first item on my agenda is the toughest challenge I can think of: the Marines Bottom Field assault course.
TOUGH TIMES Mentally steeled for the ordeal ahead, a quick glance at the Connected’s weather app delivers the small consolation that I won’t be facing my first military-style training in a deluge. After setting up the TAG with travel alerts via City Mapper and Google Maps (so I’m not wrongfooted by a change of schedule), I cycle
the six miles to the station to catch my train to Devon. I’ve also downloaded Strava’s tracking app to keep tabs of my performance en route. It’s considerably more rewarding to see the stats pop up on screen as I pedal, rather than waiting to check the data on my phone post-ride. I find I push myself that bit harder.
Settling in on the train, my wrist vibrates again – this time alerting me to a last-minute ‘good luck’ call from my editor. Even without connecting to your phone, Google’s Android Wear operating system has plenty of features to play with, whether you’re reorganising your playlist, planning a client dinner or, in my case, finding your way from genteel London to purgatory in Devon.
Three uniformed men in green berets approach as I disembark at the camp’s railway station and I’m soon on the receiving end of a warm welcome and abnormally firm handshake. I’m escorted to the kit room by a captain named Olly, whom I question about the Bottom Field’s reputation. I start the voice-recorder app on the TAG, eliminating the usual faff of fiddling with a dictaphone, to record key quotes for later. “You’ll be taken through one of the easiest sessions we do with recruits,” says Olly. That’s good. “But it’s still going to be hard.”
Kitted out in my camo and boots, I’m taken to the outdoor drill ground to meet the Royal Marines physical training instructors (PTIS), Ash and Benny, who both, predictably, embody the proverbial brick outhouse. “The difference between marines and athletes is that we need to be prepared for anything – we can’t train just to be specialists in a single discipline,” Ash explains. The aptly named Bottom Field Pass Out is made of four components designed to test each recruit’s readiness for combat: a rope climb, a fireman’s carry, a water tank rope crawl and an assault course.
The TAG certainly feels like it’s able to handle the rigours of the course. Built in the brand’s Chaux-de-fonds workshop alongside its other mechanical models, it has a tank-like robustness, along with the sort of high-grade finish that has earned Switzerland its fine watchmaking reputation. The sporty rubber strap feels equally substantial, but sits comfortably on my wrist. Given what I’m about to undertake, I’m grateful to minimise all possible distractions.
I set the timer on the TAG’S Google Fit app, and after a gentle jog with a few squats and lunges thrown in, the warm-up escalates to a series of 50m sprints, press-ups and sit-ups. Five rounds in, I’m told to lie back with my eyes closed, naively expecting a moment to recuperate. Suddenly winded by a heavy thud into my chest, I’m startled to find Benny on top of me, attempting to pin my arms to the floor. “Fight him off!” comes the instruction. The ordeal ends when I finally take up the invitation to tap out of a choke hold.
The PTIS then jog me over to my first official test – a daunting 30ft rope climb. During their training, recruits will scale the equivalent of three Eiffel Towers. It’s all I can do to haul myself off the ground and wriggle up a few metres from the floor. Unable to replicate the
technique that allowed my instructor to shoot to the top in seconds (I clocked it), my arms burn out before I’m halfway.
HEAVY LIFTING The next item on the agenda – the 200m man carry – is serious business. The pressure is increased when I’m told Benny is the ‘wounded’ comrade I need to deliver safely to the finish line. Taking his 100kg frame onto my shoulders in a fireman’s lift, I cover half of the distance without faltering. But on the home straight, my grip loosens and my quads melt to jelly – it takes every iota of willpower to reach the safe zone within the 90-second limit. Via the Bluetooth monitor I have strapped to my chest, the TAG Connected later tells me I hit a peak heart rate of 198bpm at this point. “Everything inside is telling you to drop to the floor,” Ash says, using an arm to keep my wobbling body upright. “But you can’t lie down in a warzone.” Quite.
Next up is my timed lap – recruits need to complete this in five minutes, carrying 14kg of kit and a weapon. Without the benefit of 15 weeks’ rigorous preparation, I’m mercifully spared some of the more technical obstacles and the weighty add-ons. Even so, 6ft walls, monkey bars and rope crawls soon take their toll. With my face in the gravel inside the long, claustrophobic tunnel known as the ‘smartie tube’, I feel like I’m crawling through treacle, though the built-in torch on my TAG provides some much-needed illumination. When I eventually emerge into the light, I summon my last reserves of aggression for the cargo net wall before sprinting the last few metres toward the waiting PTIS.
At this point, glancing at my watch’s timer, I notice the battery is already down to 53% – which just so happens to be rather reflective of how I’m feeling. Like all smart devices, the more apps you use, the faster the juice depletes. But the Connected 45 does have an ingenious power-saving feature in the form of ‘wrist gesture’ settings – the watch senses when you hold it up and brightens the display, animating its face. When lowered, it returns to a semi-dormant state, conserving energy. Something that I, it seems, have failed to master.
As if the smartwatch’s durability needed further scrutiny, there’s a good chance I’m about to get wet – the watertank rope crawl requires recruits to shuffle across a 30ft traverse. After several exhausted attempts, my muscles fail me, and I plunge into the cold water. Thankfully, the TAG is watertight up to 50m, so unless you intend to go diving for pearls, you don’t have to worry when taking a plunge, expected or otherwise.
By the time I complete my endurance test – 68 minutes, to be precise – my watch registers that I have clocked 6.5km and exactly 12,743 steps. Not bad for an afternoon’s work. I leave the course with a few cuts and bruises, and immense respect for the professionals – both military and horological.
FRESH FACED On the return train journey, a Whatsapp message buzzes through to my wrist – it’s a friend reminding me of our dinner this evening. With the Google Fit app telling me I burned 1129 calories in just over an hour, a cold beer is on the cards.
Showered and changed, I quickly browse through the customisable watch faces, changing from the two-counter chronograph – ideal for tracking my ordeal – to a classic TAG Carrera face to match the change of environment. Novel as this is, an oft-cited issue with smartwatches is that – like the latest iphone release – they can date quickly. TAG Heuer has attempted to surmount this issue, not just through regular Android software and stylistic updates, but with an add-on mechanical movement, which can be clipped in and out. The brand’s CEO, Jean-claude Biver, says this give the Connected an ‘eternal’ element. It’s also perhaps intended to appease traditional haute horologists. Either way, it looks the part.
After loading up with a much-needed protein hit at dinner, footing the bill offers a chance to test the smartwatch’s Android pay feature before I head home. It feels slightly odd – careless, even – to be depleting my bank account with the flick of a wrist, yet the feature works seamlessly. It has survived each of the day’s trials without baring any wounds and, crucially, has performed well for a timepiece manufactured by a brand more used to dealing with escapements and rotors than Silicon Valley tech.
But is it for everyone? Well, if you’re after a fitness tracker, it certainly ticks all the boxes – although, at £ 1450, there are more wallet-friendly options. For diehard fans of mechanical pieces, it’s still recognisably a slice of electronic wrist tech, despite the appealing design. One suspects purists will never get past this. Nevertheless, it is unique in its ability to combine the multipurpose functionality of a smartwatch with the elegance and build quality of a luxury timepiece. TAG’S Connected also distinguishes itself from its competitors in its capacity for customisation, with interchangeable dials, lugs, buckles, case materials and bezels forming thousands of design options. If you’re the kind of busy man with a multifaceted lifestyle that defies designation – and I like to identify as such – you’d be a fool to resist.
IT’S CONSIDERABLY MORE REWARDING TO SEE THE STATS APPEAR ON SCREEN AS I GO. I FIND I PUSH THAT BIT HARDER